Halloween has passed and now we shift gears to prepare for the biggest holidays of the year. My personal favorite being Thanksgiving. We've packed away our kid's costumes that won't fit next year, the pumpkins are dilapidated and all the good candy has been eaten. I don't want to forget what a cow costume taught me this year.
I now understand why parents dress their kids up in costumes and parade through their neighborhood. It's fun and the only time you are welcomed to go to all your neighbor's houses -- if they have the lights on.
My husband and I said, "We will never dress our kids up for Halloween."
Why? Well, we believe it's pointless, a waste of money and we personally don't dress up.
But, here he is, tights and all. He is a miniature cow in case you can't tell. We were at a friend's Halloween party and right before they were heading out to trick-or-treat they offered up an extra costume. Considering, it was cold and my son wasn't wearing socks, I gladly excepted. What followed was pure joy...
My almost 1-year-old dressed-up as a cow induced a fit of joyful psychotic laughter that I didn't even know was there. I don't recall ever being that happy. Except maybe after several shots of tequila but, that normally ends in tears -- you know what I mean? This was a kind of joy that was buried somewhere deep inside of me that was waiting to be awakened by the tiniest cutest farm animal.
I love my tiny cow son. It's endearing to see him and hundreds of other children innocently collecting candy from kind neighbors.
I thought, "This is it. This is why people have children!" I can't accurately explain how it feels to see my little guy in a push-cart as we roll through the neighborhood. He was fist-pumping the air and even picked candy out of the bowls himself, which he can eat when he is 18.
Along with co-sleeping, I'm adding this to the growing list of, "Things I Said I Would Never Do."
Having a child has called me to be more present and less rigid. I'm soaking in the joy that comes from unexpected cow costume moments. I understand what it's like to be a Mom 24/7. To love a little human who is so dependent on me. To be his protector, play-mate, molder of his heart and personal paparazzi. I mean, we stare at him while he's eating an apple. No wonder only children are spoiled. How can we not be in awe of this human that we created?
My friend who has a son the same age as mine says, "Motherhood is kicking my ass."
It's an accurate description. Motherhood is kicking my ass -- kicking my ass into a better human being.
Motherhood is shaping me into a more compassionate, present, joyful, loving and honest person. I should have had a kid a long time ago. I'm not even a year into parenthood. I can't imagine the challenges to come and the crap my kid is going to put me through.
I'm enjoying the fleeting moments of being a Mom to one little baby boy. One little cow, in a herd of cattle. In this moment, my son is sleeping which brings about a different sort of enjoyment.
One day when I'm old, wrinkled and still sexy all that will be left of these sweet baby days will be the memories that will live in me and in pictures. A photo, video or even my memory can't capture these precious days of life. We can't bottle them up and we shouldn't wish them away. We can only intentionally live them out. This is it, this is life. It's beautiful, difficult, confusing and absolutely worth living.
So, what did a cow costume teach me about life?
- I was reminded to laugh and experience happy moments with abandon.
- It taught me to be more flexible with my opinions.
- It reminded me of why I am doing life with my husband.
- It showed me what a blessing children are.
- I learned I have the cutest kid to have graced this planet.