I turned 40 this year. As a woman and entrepreneur, I often find myself thinking of all the lessons I would want to impart on my children. When I was growing up, I thought my parents were awful. Curfew? Good grades? Tough expectations? Sometimes it just felt like a lot! But as I became older, I found myself thinking more and more like them.
The thing is, I’ll never have kids. I’ll never have a future daughter. At age 29, I had a stroke due to birth control and hormonal abnormalities. A daughter is not in the cards!
As an entrepreneur and employer, I meet all of these amazing young women graduating from college with great grades, an impeccable resume, but without many of the important experiences and skills it takes to truly thrive as a young adult...
Love to read
As a young child, one of the things that my mother did with me and my two brothers was to sit and read with us. We each grew to love books and losing ourselves in a story. Now as adults, we are all still avid readers, with my two brothers each building careers around their love for books and for learning. But in addition to Mom making us book lovers, she gave us a huge leg up in this world. Because if you are a strong reader, you likely spell well, have strong grammar skills, read more quickly, think more critically - and are overall more productive.
Participate in after school activities
I was never hugely athletic. And I never did anything for more than a couple of years at a time, but in my lifetime, I was a gymnast, softball player, cheerleader, piano player, runner, and tennis player. Each of these activities have led to so many additional interests as an adult. Although grades are super important, life is so much more than a report card full of Straight A's. Outside activities make you a more well rounded person with varied interest, experiences, knowledge, and often more self-discipline.
Choose your college classes well
Choose classes that will allow you to actually utilize the skills, not just learn the theory. Take labs. Get an internship. This past year, I hired a recent college grad, with amazing grades, from a prestigious school. She had a social media and marketing degree. Despite this amazing education, she had had no knowledge how to actually use most social media platforms for business purposes. When we were reviewing how to use Twitter and Instagram for connecting with our clients, prospects, and other businesses, she had no idea how to do it. She said that in her classes, they learned theory, but never really learned HOW to do any of it. I graduated college in 1997, still very early into the life of the internet. To this day, one of my most helpful classes has been my Capstone Senior Business Class that required us to imagine a product, write a business and marketing plan, design (AND code) a website, and actually get onto our college campus and promote our imaginary product. My university understood that they could teach me all about how Pepsi builds their business, but it isn't until I actually had to do some of it myself that I understood what it took. It will forever be one of the things that I am most grateful about! Even today, I can code basic HTML and build a basic website - something that was bleeding edge in 1997!
Now, I'm not advocating four years of hard partying - at all! Much of what you are learning and doing in college will have some type of impact on your future life. For most students, college is that in between time, where you aren't a kid anymore, and you're spreading your wings, learning how to be more independent. But at that same time, you still have help from Mom and Dad just in case something goes wrong. This is the time to start learning to pay bills, developing a budget, managing your time, developing self discipline, and making good decisions for yourself! In many colleges, they aren't tracking whether you show up to class or not. They are counting on you to be responsible enough to take care of yourself. Remember, if you fail a class, get arrested for under age drinking, or get in trouble - you're now a legal adult. Have fun, experience life without all the responsibilities (and rules), but know that these decisions DO matter! Don't make bad ones!
Join a sorority
Of all the things that I say in this article, this may be one of the most controversial. It's likely that you either you love greek life or don't. But greek life is SO much more than just the parties, formals, and social events. Many of your sorority sisters will be your lifelong friends (and future business network). You live together for years during college, and they become your support system. They often become like a part of your family, that you arrange your annual vacations to get together and catch up. But in addition to the relationships you will develop, greek life can give you one of the largest networks available after college. As most sororities are national organizations, you have a natural built in network of "sisters" who want to help you succeed, who are just a phone call or email away!
Take a semester and study abroad
As a college student, it really doesn't cost much more to live abroad for a semester than it does to live on campus. You still have similar (if not the same) tuition. You normally pay about the same for room and board. The biggest expense for a semester abroad is travel expenses/spending money. But there will likely never be another time in your life, where you may get the opportunity to really immerse yourself in another culture. So many semester abroad programs have been designed specifically to maximize your ability to experience the culture - with classes built into only 3-4 days a week, allowing students the freedom to travel and enjoy the experience! If at all possible, save your pennies as you're growing up for this experience. It may genuinely be a once in a lifetime opportunity. Don't miss out!
Don't be in a rush to get married!
I grew up in the midwest. I had been VERY serious through college, finishing with a degree and two business concentrations in three years - all while normally working 15-20 hours a week. While my college friends were just finishing their senior year, I started full time as a financial advisor with American Express on my 21st birthday! I was married by 22 and divorced by 24! I was in such a rush to be an adult, that I missed out on a lot of the opportunities that really should come with college! And whether you realize it or not, at 22, you still really don’t know who you are. Your future spouse is one of the biggest decisions you’ll make in your whole life. Get out of college, get that first job and put your head down. Figure out who you are and who you want to be. You’ll find that the better you know yourself as an adult, the better the choices you will make about your friends and future partner!
As you graduate high school and start the next phase in your life, remember, your college experience should be an amazing opportunity to test out independence and grow as an individual. You have all the time in the world to figure it all out. You don’t have to have all the answers today! Learn, grow, and take the time to make mistakes. Life is short… enjoy the journey!!
Amy Mewborn, CFP is an author, speaker, and business strategist who specializes in helping women build a business that provides financial and lifestyle freedom. You can get more information at amymewborn.com.