Remember in like seventh or eighth grade, how we had the "opportunity" to dissect a frog? And although some of you thought it was fascinating and the coolest thing ever, I'd say that the majority thought it was disgusting and overwhelming. Right? For me, the worst part was definitely my science teacher! OMG! I swear, he was completely obsessed with every.single.detail. of that fucking frog, down to the teeniest, tiniest spec. He was super thorough, super detailed and oftentimes, got super sidetracked. I remember that he'd get so wrapped up (and basically stuck) on one aspect of that stupid frog that we had to constantly remind him where he started. We were constantly reeling him back in. Oddly enough, it's quite similar to what I do with you, bridey. I reel you back in, and try to prevent you from dissecting the wedding planning process so that you remember where you started, and quit losing your mind over the teeniest details.
But, seriously... Isn't ironic that all of these years later, mentally, I find myself back in Mr. Brown's (I think that was his name!) science class (YIKES!), but instead of ripping open that fucking frog, I'm trying to prevent you, bridey, from dissecting your wedding planning? I'm trying to guide you though each "cut" and move you along seamlessly so that you don't get stuck on ONE thing. I'm trying to prevent you from being over thorough, over detailed and super sidetracked. Because sadly, the fastest way to ruin your wedding planning experience is to overcomplicate it, and get stuck on the smallest details.
The crazy thing, is that so many of you do this, and you know you do it! I was chatting with a very chill, very down to earth friend of mine who's getting married next December (2017!), and she admitted that she's already taking a ride down the wedding planning rabbit hole. And while she feels herself falling, there's nothing she can do to stop it. So, I offered her a l'il bit of perspective... I reminded her that while it's easy to fall, the way you can pull yourself out of the rabbit hole is to remember that your wedding is ONE day out of your life. ONE DAY! And, while there is a lot wrapped up in this one day, it's still just ONE day out of your life.
To shed a little light, I told her my story... I mean, who would have thought that less than a year after I was married, my husband would be hospitalized with pulmonary embolisms? Or that when we tried to start a family, we failed and needed to go through round after round of IVF (here's the whole story)? We certainly didn't think we'd be battling any of these obstacles. Right?? Bridey, do I look back on my wedding day with emotion and fondness? Absolutely! But, more than that, I look back on my marriage, and I am grateful that my hus and I had such a solid foundation to get through the bullshit.
Bridey, will there be times during your wedding planning when you lose sight of the big picture? Definitely. But, every time you get sidetracked, and every time you get obsessed with the minutia or you start over-thinking, you lose. You have to remember that the more you dissect, the less you will have in the end (seriously, think about what that poor, torn apart frog looked like when we were done!). You'll end up looking back on your wedding planning and maybe even your wedding, with mixed emotions, just like dissecting a frog...