I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by conscious endeavor.” ~ Henry David Thoreau
Over the last month, my children have had some challenges at school. I have learned a lot by watching them act and watching them respond. I often take away many leadership principles from just being present in their lives. I would like to share a few of these principles with you.
As leaders, there are times when we are not prepared to "show up" for our teams. In those cases, we try to react in the best way we know how. However, I have found that proactively preparing to meet certain challenges pays off much more.
Part One: A few weeks back, I found out that my daughter was having a tough relationship with one of her classmates. Truthfully, she was being bullied. She was really struggling with how to handle this person and the relationship she had with her. As a parent, I questioned, I guided, I probed.
More importantly, I coached her to take back her own personal power.After returning to school and becoming increasingly frustrated, she decided that she must speak directly with the classmate to let her know that her behavior, gestures and reciprocal treatment were no longer acceptable to my daughter.
She had that conversation, and I am proud of her for doing so.
After having that direct conversation, she noticed some differences. Nonetheless, some of the behavior continued. My daughter chose to distance herself altogether.
This made the classmate feel very uncomfortable, because she was losing control.
My daughter updates me weekly on this and I have taken some steps to inform those who need to know. I think that she will grow from this experience; so have I.
Part Two: The other day, my son had an interaction with a classmate that led to the boy using a racial slur.
My son was hurt.
He tried to hide the hurt. It did not work.
Immediately after the incident, he told one teacher. He did not feel like that teacher took his report seriously. So, when returning to class, he told another teacher. Thankfully, she immediately told the Dean. The Dean then took fair steps to listen to my son's side of the story and respond with a resolution. The Dean also proactively let us know of the issue and what he planned to do about it.
We were comforted by this diligence and proactive handling of the issue.
My Reflections: These interactions remind me of the many different opportunities leaders have to either prepare to respond to their teams, or not. They remind me of the many times leaders choose to support their employees, or not. They remind me of the opportunities leaders may miss to mentor and coach their employees to land on reasonable solutions.
My Take-Away:
- Be the leader that employees feel comfortable coming t
- Never assume the worst in those when they speak up and put that trust in you.
- Seek to find a solution that makes them feel heard.
- Address problems head on. Letting problems fester just increases frustrations and decreases confidence and trust.
- Self-leadership is the most powerful type of leadership.
- With clarity of the right and wrong way to do things, we can feel good about taking proactive steps to solve our own issues .Leaders and employees alike, don't be afraid to ask for help or to involve others if it helps you land on a more objective and fair outcome.
- Finally, leadership starts with you and does not require a certain title to make it so.
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Thank you for reading this post. I hope that you, too, learned something from my children's challenges. They inspire and teach me everyday. If you think others might benefit from the message, please do Like and Share with your network.I always enjoy having a dialogue with my readers, so please do Comment to add your insights too