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What Should Dads Do for New and Seasoned Moms on Mother's Day?

05/05/2016 02:41pm ET | Updated December 6, 2017
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If your partner has not had a mother's day before then it's time to step up, Dads, and make your mark on her special day. If she's had many Mother's Days before, make this one the one she'll remember with joy.

20 Hints for a Unique Mother's Day:
1. Let her sleep late!
This is the prime, number 1 gift to give. She gets to sleep until she naturally rises in the morning or afternoon!

2. Help your kids during the week each make a present for her especially from them. Buying is fine but creating your own gift is even more special.
Remember this is to be a surprise, so you have to get her out of the house doing something pleasureable.

3. Cook or buy all the meals.
You know her special favorite foods. Now's the time to gather the ingredients and put them together. Buying is fine! You don't have to cook everything. Have the kids participate.

4. Clean up messes.
You can't make the food and leave the mess!!

5. Do the laundry and fold it and have the kids help you put it all away!
Very special would be to lay out the clothes for school on Monday.

6. If a restaurant is in your plans, make sure it's child centered.
There's nothing like squabbling kids in a noisy restaurant on Mother's Day. Have things for the kids to do at the table.

7. If your partner is very social, invite other mothers and kids to visit.
Remember you do the prep and cleaning up!

8. If your partner is more of the quiet type, keep lots of people far away and give her the day she's been wishing for.
Peace and quiet.

9. If your partner likes time to herself, take the kids out for as long as she wishes. Give her that time alone she's been waiting for all year.

10. Remind your kids who live far away like those at college to call and send their gift ahead.

11. Remember to encourage the kids to say how much they love her several times during the day.

12. Get a babysitter for the later evening and spend time alone together--that time you've promised by both have had trouble getting to.

13. If she is a career woman and workaholic, ask if you can have her phone for the day.calls. Take careful messages but make it a total work free day.

14. Sit with the kids and write her a poem. You don't have to be a poet laureate, she'll get the message.

15. Sit with the kids and write her a song. You don't have to sing on key, she'll love it!

16. Make a list with the kids of all the things she's done for you all the time she's been a mother--the more kids, the longer the list!! But if she's a new mother, remember all those baby-taking -care-of-details that she's come to put into her day's routine.

17. If she's the type who always thinks of everyone before herself, stop her this time. It's her day. She needs reminding!

18. Gather a whole bunch of smiling selfies and put them in a beautiful box for her to look at on other days to remind her of today.

19. If she's game, gather around her and do a Mother's Day dance signing Happy Mother's Day to the birthday song.

20. Love is the key word today. When she goes to sleep with you, remember to say how much you appreciate and love her as the unique mother she's become.

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Laurie Hollman, Ph.D. is a psychoanalyst and author of Unlocking Parental Intelligence: Finding Meaning in Your Child's Behavior. Read some chapters on Amazon and make it a gift for the mother of the house!