It was a question that used to circle around my brain often.
"I know what I need to do, but I'm just not doing it. What's wrong with me?"
Probably the same one circling around yours.
The answer? (Let me put you at ease.)
Nothing is wrong with you!
The answers you need are in the details, so listen closely.
You have all the information you need.
You may have had a short success doing it before.
Whether it be quitting alcohol
Hitting that diet and losing some weight
Whatever the challenge is
So. You know you can do it.
But. This time it's harder.
Like pulling out teeth, or a dark hole you can't get out of.
I was in that hole once too, you know.
And the one thing that kept me there?
When you shame yourself for a long time and tell yourself the same stories over and over again that hurt you...
... Your self-esteem goes
Your dignity disappears
Your social connections leave
Your confidence caves
You second guess yourself
You don't feel empowered
You secretly start to resent others
Your brain only needs 3 repetitions of anything to take it on as a habit.
So, those nasty thoughts you've been having about yourself.
Have you had them for a long time?
Do they feel like a habit?
Do you feel like you're hiding because your confidence isn't what it used to be?
Has your self-esteem left you?
Are you shaming yourself, because despite you knowing what you need to do, and despite you having all the knowledge to do it. YOU JUST CAN'T DO IT?
Do you secretly resent others because it looks like they are doing great, and you're not. Then feel crappy for doing it?
Would you like to break free from the habits which are holding you back?
Would you like to kick those tormenting and terrorizing thoughts into touch?
Would you be willing to go one step further and do something about it?
I think we all would, but like anything.
It takes practice and hard work to start building a better relationship with yourself.
When people ask me where to start.
Start with YOU.