When Your Baby Makes You Feel Like A Crap Parent

Babies are so cute and awesome! Except when they make you feel like crap.

Now, I’m not saying that babies do this on purpose. Most babies don’t – and now I’m just guessing – come out of the womb with an agenda (“I’m going to see if I can make mom depressed and dad feel inadequate”).

There are some babies, however, who seem to be put on the earth for the sole purpose of taking us down a notch. These are the babies who like to help us become more flexible and more humble.

They also like to let us feel really good about ourselves for brief periods of time (like when they sleep through the night for 3 days in a row), and then BLOW EVERYTHING UP IN OUR FACES.

Here are some other strategies these babies like to use:

  • Helping their parents feel extra special and needed by not allowing themselves to be put down, ever.
  • Not falling into any kind of routine for at least the first three years because routines = boring and predictable.
  • Expressing their keen fondness for their parents by waking frequently so they can spend more time together.
  • Keeping things interesting by doing everything exactly the opposite of what the baby books say.

Now, I can already hear some of you saying, “Harumph! This is all an excuse for bad parenting!”

To those people, I say, you were obviously blessed with an “easy” or at least “not-so-difficult” baby (and yes, research does support the notion of “difficult” and “easy” babies. Around 10% are difficult and 40% are easy).

And just so you know, telling parents of these more difficult babies that they’re somehow at fault because of their child’s temperament is…well, pretty crappy.

Think about it: Most of these parents had the same dreams, plans and ideas you did before having a child. They read the same books, and use many of the same techniques and strategies.

They weren’t going to let their baby rule their life…in fact, their baby was just going to learn what was expected and come along for the ride!

Dinner out with friends? Bring baby along!

Party that starts at 8? Just put him to bed a little late!

Baby’s got a runny nose? Bring her along to work…she can sit and play!

Sorry, but not all babies agree to these terms of service.

Some babies just aren’t born with the flexibility or adaptability to “fit in” to their parent’s lifestyle.

They require tons of holding, attention, distraction, entertainment and flexibility to behave in a way that doesn’t absolutely destroy their parents.

Fun, hey?

But while these babies can indeed be draining, I’ll let you in on a secret: they can also be pretty freaking amazing. They’re full of life, wildly entertaining and can light up a room with their smile. And as they get older, they tend to be sensitive, compassionate and natural-born leaders.

So if you have a baby who makes you feel like crap, know that it DOES get better! You’re not a crap parent, even though it may be hard to believe right now.

Do you have a “high need” baby? Not sure? Take our free quiz to find out: Do You Have a High Need Baby?

Photo used under CC 2.0.

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