White House: Rove May Testify When Dead

Under pressure to reach a compromise, White House counsel Fred Fielding has told the Senate Judiciary Committee that it is free to take testimony from Administration aide Karl Rove, under oath, once he is deceased.

If this is unacceptable, Fielding further offered, Rove will voluntarily testify before the Committee in the dead language of Kirin Tor, the ruling body of the magocratic societies of Dalaran, based in the Violet Citadel, before the downfall of the Kingdom of Lordaeron.

Said President Bush of the proposal, "If this isn't extending the olive branch of bipartisanship, then what is?"

Justice Department sources said that reports that former White House counsel and Supreme Court nominee Harriet Miers had offered to provide her personal Magic 8 Ball to the Senate Committee were completely unfounded. "Initially there was some talk about her casting the I-Ching," said one official, "but it went nowhere."