My son just went into the kitchen and got me a fork. All on his own. Oh if you could see the replay of his life and see all the work that has been laid down for YEARS to make this miracle happen.
Unless you've been there, you can never fully really understand or even describe the magic of ABA- Applied Behavior Analysis. "What is ABA?" You google in fear, late at night when they tell you your child has autism and they recommend this intervention. It sounds vague and scary.
ABA is based on the science of learning and behavior. This science includes general laws about how behavior works for all of us, and how learning takes place. ABA therapy applies these laws in a way that helps to increase useful or desired behaviors. ABA also applies these laws to help reduce behaviors that may interfere with learning or behaviors that may be harmful.
But ABA has also given us a life.
My husband and I can go places with our two boys with autism, and we can do things that before felt impossible. We aren't perfectly behaved all the time (not even close!), but we can do it.
Now Greyson is 8 years old. At 2, he was taught categories. Real life items and pictures that he had to sort. Things like vehicles, animals, and clothing. He learned "fork" from the real item, and also from flash cards. Painstakingly, day after day for weeks. First receptively (the understanding of language- "hand me fork") and then from a field of three. Then expressively (spoken word- "what is it?" "Fork".)
Then he had to learn rooms in our house. Over and over and over again. "Go to kitchen." "Where is Family Room?" "Let's see playroom." Then he had to learn specific items in the rooms. "Where is the oven?" "Show me the fridge." "Where are spoons?"
Over and over and over. Repetition. Taking data every single time to look for what's working and if need be, where WE need to alter the environment to make it click for him.
And then following directions, and then two step directions. (Ex- go to your room, get shoes.) It's SO HARD for him to keep more than one step in his mind at a time. And then three. All of it heavy in language- a category that autism + apraxia makes so freaking hard.
And tonight I needed a fork and I didn't really want to get up for the 800th time. So with hope in my heart, I turned to him and said- "Go get mom fork." (We don't waste "please" or "thanks" with him. We are only working on functional at this stage of his life.)
And in slow motion, he goes to the kitchen and pauses. I hold my breath. I watch him intently as he opens the utensil drawer. I can see his wheels turning. He walks back into the family room and lays this down in front of me like it's no big deal.
But to me, it is everything.