After a flurry of media -- and photos that would put a blush on anyone's cheeks -- we all may be asking ourselves why Hilary Clinton's aide of many years stayed as long as she did with former US Representative Anthony Weiner? This isn't the first time he's been caught with his pants down (and undies sporting more than is decent), it's his third. So why did Huma Abedin stay so long?
Ms. Abedin has said she gave long and painful consideration to her decision to separate from her husband, and how hard she worked at her marriage. Religion may well have been one reason for hanging on, despite his previous scandals and addiction. Her career and connection with the Democratic presidential nominee Hilary Clinton was most likely another, but her son may have been her strongest reason she attempted to keep their family together.
But, despite all this, it is obvious there is no saving her marriage and she must move forward. It takes courage to walk away when the spotlight is focused on you, knowing that every word, every look, every intention will be examined under a microscope of public opinion.
Addiction, it's never pleasant or pretty when dealing with it. And when it's a reoccurring component in a marriage, it can be destructive, often ending in divorce. Sexual addiction adds an extremely personal aspect that usually includes infidelity, betrayal, secrets, and lies. A combustible combination that can include collateral damage, which unfortunately includes their four-year-old son.
Earlier this month a University of Washington's study revealed the "Cat of Sadness" graph that showed the peak times for divorce are March and August. The idea behind the peaks is that as humans we tend to avoid conflict at certain times of the year, such as the holiday season. But when those nearing divorce find things aren't better even after a time of hope and celebration, they pull the trigger after the New Year and thus a spike in March. Same goes for waiting out a school year until filing, causing August divorce rates to rise.
Obviously, there are those exceptions when we are driven toward separation and divorce regardless of the time of year. This would be one. Despite the election year, despite the coming holiday season, Ms. Abedin has no choice but to distance herself from the object of such pain and do what is best for her family.
Our hearts go out to Ms. Abedin as she endures her husband's latest sexting scandal. But, even more heartbreaking is that their four-year-old son has been dragged into the public's eye. The parents have chosen careers that open up their lives to the world: it's to be expected. But, the child is innocent, yet he will bear the scars of all this unseemly fallout.
What we tend to forget is that every word, every news article, every text, every image is out there in the virtual world and their son will grow up in the shadow of such notoriety. Some directly caused by the shameful actions of a father who suffers from an addiction, by the media frenzy that finds it all newsworthy, by a public that can't seem to get enough, and by the somewhat-unseemly nature of politics to use as fodder against an opponent. It is forever. How easily we forget the number one rule of social media: never put something out there you wouldn't want your grandma to see!
It will not be an easy journey, the process of divorce devastating in even more normal circumstances. But with proper guidance and support, and parents that truly want to do what is best for their child, this can be done without anger and hate. Hopefully, Mr. Weiner will, once again, seek help for his sexual addiction. All children need the love of both parents, maybe he'll be able to get it together and be the father his son needs.
It's just too bad Carlos Danger couldn't see beyond his own selfish needs and consider his family first.