The word forgiveness gets thrown around a lot--often on a surfaced level. It's easy to talk about forgiveness, and it's easy to repeat a mantra "I forgive." But without doing the deeper work of forgiveness--it won't get you far.
Life has challenging times--from being mistreated, abused, wrongfully fired, hitting the brink of bankruptcy, lawsuits, divorce, disease, to death of loved ones. The longer you play on this earth the longer you are likely to face a hardship where it isn't always so easy to say the words "I forgive you," and mean it.
Saying the words without doing the deeper work is like cleaning a moldy bathroom. It's not enough to clean off the surface with a spritz of cleaner. You need to get to the root of the problem--remove the mold and clean the surface!
If you don't--you'll find yourself repeating the same life challenges. You'll find yourself stuck and not manifesting the life you desire.
Holding the pain and heaviness of the person or situation that caused you harm in your life is a heavy burden to carry.
That burden of holding the pain weighs you down and consumes an enormous amount of energy.
If you could release the burden, you'd free up that energy. Then, you could redirect it and manifest the life you want.
There's a direct link between forgiveness and manifestation -- a topic that author Connie Domino goes into depth about in her book The Law of Forgiveness.
What I'd like to share with you is a step-by-step forgiveness process that will help dislodge the burden so that when you finally get to the words "I forgive you," you mean it.
At that point--you'll have freed up massive amounts of energy to manifest anything--from opportunities in your work, relationships and your bank account.
I've personally found this process to work faster than my logical mind can comprehend.
The process is something I started to play with a few months ago, and I continue to be in awe by the power that true forgiveness creates -- leading to manifestations of prosperity.
Here's the process:
1. Choose one person or situation that you catch yourself mulling over or blaming for making your life bad. It could be the business partner that walked away with 10K, or the family member who repeatedly puts you down. It could be anything. Choose something you'd like to let go of.
2. Now that you've chosen this situation, allow yourself to journal about it. Get it out of your system. If journaling isn't your thing then let your mind talk it through. Make it clear that what happened was not ok. You can metaphysically speak to the person and let them know exactly why you've been hurt or angry at them. Let it all out. This is the hard work of forgiveness that many people bypass. If you skip to the affirmation without clearing out the junk--you'll find yourself still bogged down by the past pain. The burden of the past cannot be lifted before you fully bring it to the surface so that it can release.
As Charles Whitfield M.D. explains:
"Forgiveness is a process that is analogous to if not in large part identical to the grieving process"
3. Give yourself time to feel. Neglecting a feeling won't make the feeling go away. Feeling the feeling through will help it dissolve naturally. All feelings complete themselves when given the time to be fully expressed. Plus--as you bring up all this hurt--you can feel all that energy. That is the energy you want to release and let go of. Decide that you want to let this go.
4. Make it clear to yourself that you're ready to forgive so that you can let go of the burden you've been carrying. Forgiveness doesn't mean condoning behavior or that you'd even invite this person back into your life. Forgiveness means you're ready to stop having this situation control your life. You're ready to let go of the burden of hurt that's been consuming enormous amounts of your energy. Deciding to release the situation completely means you're ready to move on.
5. Move into forgiveness... You can picture this person and finally say, "I release you. I forgive you. I let you go." (for more affirmation mantras you can check out The Law of Forgiveness by Connie Domino)
6. Envision the energy between you and the situation clearing.
7. Notice how you feel. By this time you can expect to feel lighter and happier. Keep releasing and clearing until you feel the negativity has cleared. At this point you may find it helpful to physically release the energy by doing something active (such as taking a walk, yoga, or hit the gym, to help deepen the release of all the energy that surfaced.
8. Stay present for what manifests in your life in the next 48 hours. Acknowledging abundance helps bring more prosperity your way. Abundance can come in the form of ideas, opportunities and money.
9. Recognize that you'll likely find certain situations are easier to clear than others. There are some situations where the process above is all you need to do. After one shot you're free and clear forever. Other situations--especially if you find yourself confronted with this person, you'll need to clear, release, and forgive again. Some hurts exist in layers and the longer a hurt has ben festering, it can take longer to release all the stuck energy that's been holding you down. Stay committed to this process and know that with each clearing more and more of the negativity is releasing from you.
Through this process you'll find that more energy becomes available to you to take positive action in your life--helping you manifest the success you desire and deserve.
10. Check in regularly with yourself. If you make this a consistent process you'll catch yourself releasing things as they happen so that as challenging situations enter your life you'll find yourself releasing them before they have time to fester and bog you down.
Step #10 is the trick to maintaining a high vibration, clear energy, and an ability to manifest consistent abundance into your life.
If you find yourself struggling with this--make sure you get the support you need. If it feels too painful to even start this process I recommend seeing a licensed therapist.
If you feel you need gentle support to help you clear the blocks and walk through the above process--I can help you with that via The Clarity Session. Click here for more info + to sign up.
Tova Payne is a writer, teacher, and intuitive consultant based out of Vancouver BC. She helps creatives and soul-seekers find clarity, awaken their intuition, and take action on their dreams. For a free Meditation Audio + E-Guide on 5 Keys to Start & Finish Your Dream Projects--Sign up at www.tovapayne.com