Dimming your own light so others do not feel threatened is draining and deflating. And it does not serve anyone. Do you shine the way you want to shine? Or are you constantly putting yourself down in order to keep others up and to keep others comfortable? Are you empowering yourself or are you always looking for love by giving even when the giving does not resonate with your heart? Do you need permission from others to be authentic? Is it more important for you to be liked than to be real? Are you afraid of rejection?
Rejection hurts. It penetrates deeply into the physical solar plexus and upwards towards the heart. It burns like a fire that won’t go out. Rejection leads to the state of powerlessness. Rejection creates an obsessive stream of wiring in the brain that says: “I am not worthy.” It basically drains the life force out of our souls and even deep breathing does not take the discomfort away. We often link rejection to love relationships, but rejection happens everywhere.
We do all sorts of things to avoid rejection. However, rejection happens even when we do everything we can to avoid it.
How can rejection possibly be something to be thankful for?
It takes time. It takes inner work. It takes major self-love. However, rejection is often a form of protection that our invisible friends in heaven orchestrate in order to help us live into our gifts. Rejection can be perfection in a strange and profound way.
My biggest rejection came from a spiritual teacher. The story is too long to share in one blog alone. However, it was traumatic for me. I felt like all my trust and devotion was zapped. I lost faith in my spiritual practice. I felt undermined and paralyzed with doubt. I felt like the rug was pulled and I was flat on my face. I was not able to rationalize it and see anything other than it being all about me and my failings. Now I can see clearly what was going on.
Looking back at it now is like watching an old movie. I have changed and grown so much since those years. Yes. You can too. I can even post a picture of me riding a red bicycle around New York City in a red dress now! Years ago I would have posted a nice soft pink flower with a quote, and I may have even given credit of my own quote to another in order to lift them up. Ouch... It hurts to remember that.
The gifts of rejection:
1. Discovering that it is rarely about you, but you are going through it in order to evolve into the place of not taking things so personally in life.
2. Stepping into your power, and recognizing that you are worthy because of your unique gifts to the world that nobody can take away from you.
3. Healing childhood wounds that are known or unknown. The pain of rejection propels you to do the work of releasing childhood trauma.
4. Following your own bliss. Listening to the still voice within that does not need approval from an outside source.
5. Shining into your greatness because why not?
6. Recognizing the love that is right in front of you. We search in the strangest places for the acceptance that is right here. Right now.
7. Embracing the Divine and remembering the power of prayer.
8. Letting go of your fears and finding the passion to take on the world.
9. Following your heart and exposing your true self and your adorable vulnerability.
10. Stepping forward and getting out of your own way because nobody else can do that for you.
11. Opening a door because the broken one closed and it is time to step out into the fresh air.
I am going to invite you to reframe rejection. Trusting that the most incredible gifts are on the way. I know it hurts. It can create a shrinking sensation, but if you get angry enough, you can expand instead. I would not be where I am today if I was not completely rejected. That is the truth. When I see the person who stepped on my heart, I smile and send her love. Truthfully. Not fake love. But gratitude. Authentic thankfulness for propelling me into leaning on myself and finding my true teacher in the Divine!
May you shine into your greatness.
Let it go. You are beautiful.
With so much love from my Heart to yours,