The Perspective I Needed After My Marriage Ended

"[Travel] makes you realize you are just a tiny piece of a larger puzzle out there."
Writer and mom of three Julie Scagell says traveling helped her move on.
Writer and mom of three Julie Scagell says traveling helped her move on.

If there’s ever a time you need a little distraction in your life, it’s during the divorce process. That’s why we launched our Divorce Care Package series. With each post, we’ll show you what things — books, movies, recipes — helped others relieve stress in the midst of divorce, in the hopes that a few of their picks will serve you well, too. Want to share what got you through your divorce? Email us at

After eight years of marriage, writer and mother of three Julie Scagell divorced in 2009. It wasn’t an easy transition but today, Scagell said she has no regrets about her marriage or her decision to divorce.

“After eight years together and two amazing kids, I wouldn’t change that time of my life for anything,” she told The Huffington Post.

Below, Scagell shares eight things that helped her move on after divorce, including travel and taking photos of her kiddos.

The Splurge
Photo courtesy of Julie Scagell
"I took that time to splurge on travel. I went to visit friends, ran races in new locations and in the course of all that, began a new relationship with my now husband, who loves travel almost as much as I do. I think travel allows you to get out of your comfort zone and opens you up to different experiences and people and makes you realize you are just a tiny piece of a larger puzzle out there. I needed that perspective very much."
The Songs
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"I will admit I listened to a lot of sad songs. Besides 'I Will Survive'-type anthems, I also connected to songs about moving forward. Rachael Yamagata still has a special place in my heart for getting me through those early days."
The Hobby
Photo courtesy of Julie Scagell
"I love to take pictures, mostly of my kids. Any picture I took after my divorce where they were smiling gave me peace of mind there would be happy days ahead. Even though their lives were changing, we were still a happy family. The picture just looked a little different now."
The Books
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"I am a voracious reader. I read while I am getting ready in the morning, at stop lights -- really during every moment I can steal. When you're a busy mother of three with a full-time job, you have to make the time! My favorite authors include Kelly Corrigan, Liane Moriarty, Jennifer Weiner, Jojo Moyes and Gillian Flynn. One book I think every woman should read is Leslie Bennetts's The Feminine Mistake: Are We Giving Up Too Much?, a book about the struggle to balance career and motherhood."
The Movies
'Best In Show' Official Facebook
"I am always looking for a reason to laugh but I was especially in the early days after my divorce. I needed to tune out and take my mind off everything. When in doubt, I resort back to the classics: 'Caddyshack,' 'Fletch,' 'A Fish Called Wanda' and my personal favorite movie of all time, 'Best In Show,' Christopher Guest's mockumentary about a national dog show competition."
The Quote
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"The quote that kept me going was 'This too shall pass.' I said that to myself quite a bit the first year."
The Food
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"This is the era I began my love affair with sushi. I’m happy to say we are still in a very committed relationship."
The Distraction
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"I found running really helped to clear my head and keep me focused on something positive. A friend and I decided to run a race a month one summer and I ended up completing several half marathons."
Quotes About Moving On

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