Last week I helped out at my son's Montessori school during their art morning.
All children, aged 4-12, made paintings, dreamcatchers, little jars with candles. They painted sticks in bright colors. They painted each other; they were wearing their shirts inside-out to protect them from stains. It felt like a bright, happy party in the middle of an autumn day.
I was asked to help with the painting section. This is what I witnessed: There were children -- as young as 5 years old -- who wanted to give up after they drew the first line "I can't do this. I can't draw..." A boy with spiky, blonde hair called me over using my son's name:
"Can I do something else, Mother of Abe? This is too difficult for me."
There were children who painted like masters. They came, looked and did it like it was their daily job. I saw a 7-year-old boy who painted with the accurate touch of Keith Haring. Master of the canvas.
There were children who had never ever in their lives mixed white and red paint. They had never seen the beauty of two colors blending together like two young, hot lovers. They knew perfectly what would happen when you mix red and yellow.
But they had never done the actual mixing of colors. They had never felt the pressure of a brush on canvas.
I told them to talk to their art, to their brushes. I heard one child mumble: "Where do you want to go to, brush?" Instead of saying: "Good job" I let them reflect on the result.
They spoke to the figures they had painted. "How do you think they feel? You've brought them into this world." I asked a 10-year-old girl. "They are happy and that makes me happy too," she answered and started to sing.
It was exhausting -- thumbs up for all teachers! -- and I had so much fun! A girl said: "You should be our art teacher. You're really good at this!"
They don't know this is almost my job. As a creative soul alchemist I work with women who want to let go of their creative fears.
The women I work with are ready for success. They have bought expensive programs. Earn 6 K within 1 Month.or Follow my Easy 10 Step Program and you will be Happy/Rich/Beautiful.
But it didn't work for them. So many of these trainings are rooted in fear. The fear of:
- "People will think I'm crap or lazy or both. They'll think I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm totally unqualified."
- "I'll be judged as crazy. They think I'm profiting from others struggles. What if no one likes my message or buys my product"
- "I mustn't shine too brightly or have too much fun. They'll think I'm overconfident and shallow, or -- god forbid -- I fail."
Make no mistake! We're not talking about scared little bunnies here.
This has nothing to do with a lack of perseverance. This happens because they are courageous and on a mission. Wanting to change the world, even if it takes one person at the time.
There are so many women who long to be blessed with the joy of expressing freely, instead of waiting for approval. Yearning to show the world the beauty of their spirit, instead of fearing they are too average to shine. Wanting to feel a happy, big-smiled contentment when the project is ready, instead of getting sidetracked every time a better idea appears.
Here is the harsh truth: You can't hear the calling of your soul, when you don't deal with the fear part first!
Reading books is all great and deep and wonderful, but as long as you don't know what it feels like to push a brush with green paint on a piece of paper, it's all in your head -- where fear has taken over the entire house. Not much space left for happy-go-lucky creativity.
As long as you make beautiful plans -- but hide them in the drawer because you are convinced you will fail -- you will not hear the calling of your soul. You'll only hear the story of the fear in your heart and mind.
As long as you don't hear the calling of your soul, it's very hard to find out what your purpose in life is.
I'm telling you this because I was that woman for over 25 years. My experience is rooted in my own deafness. I'm the queen of fear and blame. I know fear from the inside out.
Do you want to hear what your soul is telling you? Make stuff. Get your hands dirty. Feel the disappointment when things don't go as you intended.
Making art, writing books, designing a lamp is not about the result, it's about the process!
By the way, creativity is not about making art, it is is about you. It is about daring to make mistakes, feeling the sigh of relief in your body when things go completely different and voila something beautiful happens.
Why is it we adore people who have failed time and time again? Sports men and women, entrepreneurs; we love Vincent van Gogh. We love his art, his story; we longingly look at his painting of his bedroom, fantasizing how it would have felt to open the door and touch the blankets.
Yet, when we stand a change to fail ourselves we rather don't show up at all. What will people think? We are grown-ups. We can't say: Mother of Abe, can I do something else?
How do you hear the calling of your creative soul?
Your creative soul wants you to listen. It's waiting for you to do the work. Get a pencil and draw. It doesn't matter what. Keep going, talk to the fear, ask it why it's there. Make fear your ally.
Don't give in, just have a conversation. With your paper, your pencil and after a while the miracle will happen. You become a vessel of inspiration. Maybe it will take weeks or even longer. But I promise you it will happen.
I teach a class that takes seven weeks. It's called the Creative Journey and I see it happen there. Somewhere in the middle of the program -- when we start experimenting -- the bright light bulbs of inspiration transform everybody.
It's the calling of the creative soul. It's the magic of being aligned with your authentic voice.