You have just had your first scan and you have seen two little blobs on the screen. You wonder how you will cope. You wonder how you will juggle two babies?
Well, as a twin parent, I am here to say that you need not worry!
When I first found out I was having twins I was worried and felt all the emotions you are feeling now. I had no experience of looking after a baby, far less two.
Now I am not going to sit here and tell you that it is easy street. There is no getting away from it. Being a parent to twins is hard work. But, parenting in general is hard at times.
There are so many benefits though; the good really outweigh the bad.
Don’t believe me? I don’t blame you, it’s a daunting prospect.
But, let me try and persuade you. Here are my thoughts about why twins are the best!
1. DOUBLE THE HUGS
Save this phrase my friends, you are going to need this.
You will get a barrage of questions and silly comments from well meaning strangers. “Buy one get one free” was the one that frustrated me most. If you want to be prepared for what questions you will be asked, visit my blog post here.
‘Double the hugs’ is the perfect response for ‘Double Trouble’.
2. THEY ARE THE SAME AGE
You might be thinking this is obvious and why would that be a benefit?
Let me explain…
The first year is hard, there is no getting away from that. We are all friends here so I am not going to lie to you.
But, there is something easier about having two children, the same age who have the same routine.
Sleeping is a perfect example.
When one transitions from two naps to one nap, the other twin is not far behind. This gives you a perfect opportunity to do the housework, watch TV or just have a nap on the couch.
It also makes day trips easier. It is easy to pick something age appropriate and you can plan more easily around naps.
However, having a toddler and a one-year-old, who nap at different times, makes it more difficult to go out on day trips.
3. STRANGERS OFFER HELP
They may have done this anyway but people do go out of their way to help you when you have twins. There have been so many times when I have been struggling to get off public transport and a kindly person has helped me. Stairs are the worst, you can’t take the double buggy up there. Carrying two with a bag is hard and yet people always helped me. Every time.
On the off chance any of you have done a similar act of kindness, thank you from someone who appreciated it.
4. THEY ALWAYS HAVE A BEST FRIEND
Now, my two are by no means best friends all the time – they are four and they fight over what toy they are playing with, or whose turn it is to pretend to be Luke Skywalker – but they will always have each other.
They always have someone to share experiences with.
When they start nursery, they start together.
When they start school, they start together.
When they learn to swim, they will learn together.
You get the idea…
5. YOU ONLY HAVE TO BE PREGNANT ONCE
I will admit that multiple pregnancy tends to be harder than a normal pregnancy, but it is still only one pregnancy.
In fact, I will be honest with you, I had a particularly difficult pregnancy and initial post-birth period. For anyone following my story about suffering from HELLP syndrome over on my blog Double the Monkey Business, you will understand what this means to me.
Irrespective of that, you only need to experience pregnancy, the early stages of labour and recovery once. You still have to push twice; there is no getting away from that.
6. THEY WILL SHARE BIRTHDAY PARTIES
It is great when they are younger and they share the same friends, they can share the experience. Like many they will share together.
Admittedly when they grow older, they may have different groups of friends, so it may have to be one mega party.
But still, once a year, my friends! Once a year!
7. PEOPLE ALWAYS REMEMBER YOU
Actually, they always remember the twins.
Sadly I am not as memorable as I think I am.
If people see me on my own they don’t always recognise me, which can also be a little frustrating.
Sometimes, people do remember me as well.
8. MARVELLING AT THEIR DIFFERENCES
I find this incredibly fascinating.
I have always been interested in the ‘nature’ versus ‘nurture’ debate. Even more so since I had the boys.
Despite being brought up in the same way, with the same rules and by the same parents, they are completely different. In fact, from the minute they were born they had very different personalities.
I love to see them grow up to be individuals, yet retaining an incredible connection I will never fully understand.
9. WATCHING THEM COMFORT EACH OTHER
This would melt the hardest of hearts.
Nothing is sweeter than watching one of them hug the other, telling them not to be sad and everything will be ok.
The eldest in particular gets worried when the other hurts himself. Asking why he is sad and wanting to comfort him, making everything better.
10. THEY ARE STRONGER TOGETHER
Together, they are a force to be reckoned with.
Mess with one, you have to take them both on.
If one is pushed, then the kid will have to answer to both of them.
I imagine this may turn out to be pretty useful in the school playground!
11. WATCHING THEM SLEEP
I marvelled at how adorable the boys were when they shared a cot in the early days.
I loved going to check on them when they were in separate cots and they were holding hands through the cot bars.
I love that when they were moved into big boy beds. They insisted that the beds were right next to each other – with no space between them – as they told me that they sleep better that way.
So twinparents-to-be, go forth with confidence.
All will be okay.
Enjoy every minute.
It is an incredible ride.
Remember: If it rains, look for rainbows. When its dark look for the stars
A version of this post originally appeared on www.doublemonkeybusiness.co.uk
