Why You Should Be Selfish In Your 20s

Woman sitting on mountainside
Woman sitting on mountainside

As a kid, I was always playing with dolls. I can remember sitting in the middle of my room playing with Barbie and setting the house up to look perfect. I couldn't wait to have my own home, complete with my own furniture and decorations, someday.

It's a concept that's relatable to many women today. We go on Pinterest, making sure to collect the perfect decorations for our apartments or weddings and pinning only the most Insta-worthy eats. There's something so glamorous about having your life put together -- at least online. But then you grow up and your priorities start to switch.

Flash-forward to reality: While my walls are decorated with DIY projects, I'm at a point in my life where I don't know what comes next and I don't even have enough money in my bank account to put guacamole on my Chipotle. But as I approach graduation day, the big question asked a million and a half times of me is, So, when are you settling down?

Yes, you read that right. Don't mind my graduating on time, areas of interest or where I'm headed for my first job, but please ask me more about my relationship. Regardless of the fact that I am currently in a long-term relationship, its status is all that seems to matter. I assure you, people do not bust their asses for four years and put themselves in debt up to their eyeballs to pop out a few kids upon graduation.

Back in the day, It wasn't uncommon for couples to get married straight out of high school. Generation Y has changed that. More and more young people are deciding to hold off on a family while they focus on themselves and their personal development instead. I am one of those Gen Y-ers.

But, even if I wasn't, what makes people assume that I want to settle down and start a family right away? My boyfriend of six years isn't being asked when he's proposing to me, so why am I being questioned?

My response to those people is simple: Go look at all the things I've already created. I've produced countless articles and even created my own blog. I've worked as an editor to produce a number of different publications and have worked hard mentoring others to see them grow and prosper as well. So no, I am not ready to settle down and pop out a few kids, but I am creating new ideas.

No matter what our passion is, from having a family to having a well-paying job, there is no reason that one should be automatically viewed as more important than the other. By no means am I saying that we should all stop having a family and kids; instead, we need to realize that there are many different paths to walk in life. Having a family is still high on my priority list, but that doesn't mean I'm going to get pressured out of doing what I love while I can -- and neither should you.

As members of Generation Y, we have the ability to challenge norms, create amazing opportunities for ourselves and be truly happy. Don't let anything come between you and your dreams.

Originally published by Unwritten by Kali Borovic.


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