Ex- Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-N.Y.) gave up a promising political career after his sexual scandal broke and he couldn’t stop sexting his weiner photos.
We have all made jokes about this, myself included.
Today, Huma Abedin, Clinton’s top aide, said she has taken enough, and she is ending their marriage.
Weiner apparently sent lurid tweets and photos of his crotch to yet another woman and reportedly one of the photos was of him in bed, with his sleeping young son in the background. That was the last straw for Huma.
The woman who Weiner was sexting this time allegedly ratted him out to the Post. (Was she worried about the son or was she into the publicity or was she truly disturbed by his texts? Not clear.)
It is somewhat disturbing that he has continued this behavior, regardless of the consequences. But what exactly is going on here? Is he cheating? Is he a ‘sex addict”? Or is sexting another woman considered an affair?
This morning, NBC released a statement that Abedin was announcing her separation from Weiner, which was probably a good publicity move on her part, particularly if she wants to continue to work with Clinton and follow her to the White House.
But perhaps the larger story is not one about sexting, or sex, or the Weiners, but about the crisis of infidelity in this country. Up to 60% of spouses will cheat at some point in their marriage, according to studies. But what does cheating actually mean?
This is the way I define infidelity; there are three parts to an affair; One -the outside relationship, Two - the sex and Three - the lying.
Regardless of whether or not the infidelity is through a text, a computer or in person, the idea here is that Weiner was creating some kind of outside relationship with a woman outside of his marriage, he was creating a sexual connection with her by sending naughty photos and he was, apparently, lying about it, or at least keeping it secret.
I don’t have a problem with sexting. I wish I had time to send my husband photos of myself. And frankly, if he wanted to send me something to break up my day, it might be entertaining.
I don’t have a problem with having relationships outside a marriage, I mean, how does one person meet all of our needs?
And frankly, how honest should I be with my partner? Should I tell my husband every little thing that goes through my mind all day long? He probably doesn’t want to know about the guy in the grocery store I found attractive or the sexy pictures on Facebook I am hoarding till later.
But integrity means integrating all of the parts of our lives, and not splitting off some things and choosing to integrate others.
Sexting and having an affair over a cell phone is easier than ever. This is the first time in history you can cheat on your partner lying in bed next to them. The Weiners proved that last time their weiner-sexting crisis broke. And everyone who has an iPad or a laptop knows how easy it would be to find a partner and go at it while their spouse is asleep.
But if we are so bored, restless, ADD or unhappy that we cant stop texting someone outside of our marriage for an online thrill even when our child is napping next to us, then maybe we need to confront the fact that we are - yes - cheating on our partner, and yes - move on - or negotiate for an open marriage.
Look, affairs happen. She is busy. Clinton keeps her busy. But that is no excuse. If you want to sleep with other people, or play online, go ahead, but don’t lie about it and don’t embarrass your wife in public.