Weddings

Wife Texts Husband All The Hilarious Things He Says In His Sleep

LOLing over here.

When Lindsay Stamhuis began dating Aidan Hailes in 2003, she knew he was anything but a snooze.

Lindsay Stamhuis' husband Aidan Hailes says hilarious things in his sleep. So Stamhuis texts them to him so he can read them the next day.
Lindsay Stamhuis' husband Aidan Hailes says hilarious things in his sleep. So Stamhuis texts them to him so he can read them the next day.

Just like Hailes’ brother, nephew and several of his cousins, the man she would marry seven years later was a sleep talker.

“Makes me wonder about genetics,” Stamhuis told The Huffington Post.

At first Stamhuis would scribble down the crazy things Hailes said in his sleep. Now, she just texts them to him. 
At first Stamhuis would scribble down the crazy things Hailes said in his sleep. Now, she just texts them to him. 

Soon after Stamhuis discovered her man’s penchant for subconscious pillow talk, she began to engage him in conversation.

“[At the time] I was dealing with migraine issues that were seriously affecting my sleep, so I was often up into the wee hours,” Stamhuis said. “This kept me entertained.”

Stamhuis has been texting the spontaneous sleep-talk comments to Hailes since 2012.
Stamhuis has been texting the spontaneous sleep-talk comments to Hailes since 2012.

When the couple first moved in together, Stamhuis would try to remember their conversations by writing them down by hand. Two years ago, she decided to go digital and send him texts of their hilarious exchanges. She has also started using a sleep talk recording app just in case Hailes lets loose a gem that doesn’t rouse her from her slumber.

“Aidan has a brilliant mind and he's a tremendously talented writer in his own right, so it's fascinating to see how his sleeping mind works,” Stamhuis said. “Having said that, it can be so ridiculously absurd sometimes and so amusing.”

Another hilarious sleep-talk text, courtesy of Hailes.
Another hilarious sleep-talk text, courtesy of Hailes.

Apparently Hailes isn’t alone in his absurd sleep commentary. Since posting the texts on his Imgur page, commenters have started sharing their favorite sleep talking experiences, like this one from user belchnasty: "Asked a buddy who sleep talks what gnomes were, his reply was, 'Little elves in galoshes.'"

All of Hailes’ texts are wildly entertaining, but there is one discussion the couple had in 2008 that Stamhuis remembers fondly.

"He muttered something about me being his sparring partner. I inquired about what he meant, and he replied by saying: 'You're my sparring partner. You know, like fighting.' So, I asked: 'Like fighting? How?' And he said: 'Like this,' and lifted his arm to strike me gently on the nose with the back of his hand, saying: 'Boop!' I started laughing so hard, I thought for sure he had woken up. So I asked him if he knew what he'd just done, and he answered: 'Yup!' and booped me again. I just lost it, completely."

Take a gander at a few more choice texts below.

Lindsay Stamhuis
Lindsay Stamhuis
Lindsay Stamhuis
Lindsay Stamhuis
Lindsay Stamhuis
Lindsay Stamhuis
Lindsay Stamhuis
Lindsay Stamhuis
Lindsay Stamhuis

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