Last week, the Wall Street Journal published an article about the sex lives -- and sexual issues -- of married couples. Unfortunately, they insinuated that women always want sex less than their male partners.
Salon's Tracy Clark-Flory, suspecting (like the rest of us) that this withholding wife/sex-deprived husband stereotype was not actually true, put out a call-out for stories from women who had been in relationships with men where they had the higher sex drive. She wrote about the many responses she received in a piece published Sunday, April 28th:
I was flooded with responses -- and many of these women wanted to put me in touch with female friends with similar tales of sexual dissatisfaction. There was tremendous variability in what they considered too little sex: One expressed annoyance over an ex-boyfriend who wouldn’t have sex more than four times in one night; another complained that her ex-husband wanted it no more than twice a week; and yet another reported getting busy five times in three years of marriage.
Let’s be clear: None of this is to say that the real problem is men who don’t “put out” (a phrase that makes sex sound like such a dreary chore -- can we please retire it?). It’s to show that it isn’t exclusively a “male” or “female” phenomenon, nor is it a heterosexual one; it’s a human one.
We want to keep this conversation going. If you've ever been in a relationship where your sexual needs didn't match up to your partner's, we want to hear from you! (It doesn't matter whether you were the one who wanted sex more or less.) Send a paragraph or two about your experiences to firstname.lastname@example.org.