The Absolute Worst Excuses Ever For Calling In Sick

Even worse than the dog eating your homework.
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Who among us hasn’t, on occasion, called in sick when you really weren’t? Sick time is often a use-it-or-lose-it benefit, and that fuels the temptation to hit the snooze button and just call in sick.

Using sick days to catch up on sleep, run errands or kick off the weekend early has become so commonplace that more than a third of full-time workers polled by CareerBuilder said they have gone into the office when they were legitimately sick so they could save their sick days for when they’re feeling better.

But apparently some people lie better than others. CareerBuilder’s annual survey, which covered a 12-month period ending in September, found that 40 percent of workers had claimed to be sick when they actually weren’t, and 38 percent of employers had checked up on workers who called in sick. And how exactly did they do that? Easy-peasy: 43 percent of bosses busted an employee who faked being sick by checking out their social media feeds.

Of course, some employees offered some pretty outlandish excuses for not showing up at work. Here are some of the more dubious ― or creative? ― excuses that employers in the survey reported hearing:

A bear was in the employee’s yard, and they were afraid to come out.

The employee had to reschedule a manicure because some of her artificial nails fell off.

The employee left all his clothes at the laundromat and had nothing to wear.

There was a solar eclipse and the employee wasn’t sure it was safe to leave the house.

A dog swallowed the employee’s car keys, so she was waiting for them to come out.

The employee couldn’t squeeze into her uniform and called in “fat.”

The employee broke his arm wrestling a female bodybuilder.

Harris Poll conducted this survey on behalf of CareerBuilder, questioning 2,257 hiring and human resource managers and 3,697 employees.