"Yeah but you, you are not black."
I stopped. Took a deep breath. Calmed down. And refrained myself from arguing.
When I was 16, that's what I was told by one of my white classmates. In my class there were only 2 black people. Myself and another girl (we're going to call her Orchid). Orchid was sitting in front of me with her friend and they were talking about something, I don't remember what. But then her friend, we're going to call her Lilac, told Orchid something along those lines: "OMG poor you and you're the only black girl in the class". That is when my head jerked up. Offended I then proceeded to ask "What about me?". And I was playfully thrown this very upsetting answer: "Yeah but you, you are not black".
You are not black enough to be called "black."
My skin color is what some might call "light-skin". And personally, I find this distinction between "light-skin" and "dark-skin" very offending. Because it creates a separation between the two. You just have to look that up on social media. People are proudly hashtaging which team they belong to. Claiming that one is better than the other. But that is just it, one shade is not better than the other. They all belong to the same color which is black. And black is just another color between many others. One color is not better than the other either. They are just colors. And we all belong to one simple category: humans.
Stop trying to differentiate one another and trying to find out which is better than which. We're all the same. There are already racism between different colors. We don't need people from the same color to also judge each other and try to find who's better than who.
I see too many people that have a very low self-esteem because they think that they are not up to the "standard" that their color has put. For instance, darker women would bleach their skin because the supposed beauty "standard" is to have lighter skin.
To me all those different shades are beautiful.
We should love and appreciate all the different shades and not bring one down because one is darker or lighter than the other.
I also find the distinction between "light-skin" and "dark-skin" to be offending because it implies that they don't belong together. That they are not both black. And that is why you would hear people say "you are not black." Just because my skin is not the "standard black color", like a black nail polish or a black dress does not mean I am not black. That does not give you the right to tell me what I am and what I am not. That does not mean that I am not "black enough" to be considered black.
I shouldn't even have to be considered as "black" by anyone. That IS what I am. And even if you might think that I am not black or that my skin doesn't fit in the "standard black color," you have no right to tell me what you THINK I am or what you THINK I am not.
In my personal experiences, this kind of sentence "But you're not black" was usually said by someone who was, in fact, not black themselves. So my question is, what gives you the right to tell me what I am and what I am not? Did someone give you the right to judge who was black enough to be considered "black"? Do you even know what being black is?
I'm curious, how many of you have heard "yeah but you, you're not white?" Is there any differences between the different shades of white? I know there are different shades of white. I have friends that tell each other that one's skin is lighter than the other. Not all white people are paper white. I've seen different shades. But I don't go around telling people "oh but you're not white" because they don't look like the "standard white color" which would be the same white as a piece of paper.
I don't know you, maybe you are white, maybe you are not, I don't know. But even if I did know, I have no right to tell you what you are and what you are not based on what I think I know about you. I am not pointing my finger at white people in particular but rather at the whole human race. We all feel like we can say certain things to certain people because we think that we know the right answer so we assume that we won't be offensive.
But that's just it, what you are saying is wrong. You are wrong for saying it. You are wrong for assuming that you have the right to say it. And you are even more wrong to assume that you are not being offensive. Whether the person is black, white, Asian, Mexican, mixed or anything in between, you have no right to tell them what they are and what they are not!
What/Who the person is is not for you to tell. It is for the person to discover for themselves.
I am not pointing any finger at anyone. Nor am I saying that one group of people is the "bad guy". The way I see it, the whole human race IS the bad guy, to everyone. No one is safe. Everyone judges and criticizes. Everyone is mean to each other and we all are rejecting each other. This needs to stop. WE need to stop.
It is a vicious circle.
And I am tired of it.
We fall into this ugly habit of separating things.
Black vs. White.
Light-skin vs. Dark-skin.
Men vs. Women.
Young vs. Old.
This religion vs. that religion.
To see which is better, which looks better, which is smarter, which makes a better lover, which does this better, which does that better, which will be richer, which is more talented, which is right, which is wrong etc...
Can't we all just go back to just being humans first and foremost?