The holiday season brings out a lot of different and conflicting emotions in people, but that doesn’t mean that you should be anything but happy. At this point in the season, there are deadlines, financial struggles, and relationship stressors—not exactly the concoction for a happy and healthy upcoming new year. However, this season also reminds people that they need to make themselves happy, too.
Stress is inevitable in the holiday season, but the day after your celebrated holiday should be a day of reflection. How happy are you with the holiday season and how much happier could you be if you took a minute to look at how you’re feeling? For many, it is a sad realization that because you are so worried about making everyone else happy, you forgot about yourself completely.
We all fall victim to forgetting about our own happiness for the happiness of others, but for people with this personality trait of putting others before you, the holiday season can be an extraordinarily stressful season. The biggest lesson that we, who have this trait, must learn is that you cannot please everyone.
It is the ultimate goals to achieve perfection—hey, we all strive to do it—but it just is not fathomable or conceivable to actually accomplish this goal because there is really no such thing as perfection. Everything and everyone has flaws, so when we place pressure on ourselves to be “perfect,” we are already setting ourselves up to fail. Cynical? Yes, but sometimes a little dose of harsh reality is what we need.
While perfection for others does not exist, perfection for ourselves is a bit more conceivable. We know what we like and how we like things, so nothing should stop us from making ourselves the happiest we can be! We want to make everyone happy, but we need to start with ourselves. We all know those people who are constantly putting themselves on the line for others; maybe you are one of those people. If you are, take it from someone who knows all too well that saying “yes” to each person’s questions and demands is something you can’t resist doing—you need to look out for yourself too.
If you’re one of these people, everyone asks you to do them favors and asks for your advice. You happily give it to them or do their favors because that’s just who you are, and you don’t have it in you to say “no.” Being one of these people myself, I totally understand it; it makes you feel good and useful! However, after a while you feel underappreciated and mistaken for a metaphorical doormat. When this happens, we need that gentle reminder that you truly cannot please every single person. It’s not going to happen and it’s okay! It. Is. Okay.
Many times we become metaphorical doormats for people when we are worried too much about pleasing others.
Again, no one is perfect—not even you! The only thing we know about the closest thing to “perfection” is who you, yourself are and what and how you like things. So, next time you’re helping every person you know and you feel worn down and underappreciated, take that knowledge of yourself and put it to use. Please yourself before you try to start pleasing others again because you deserve it! This holiday season, let’s see a “To: Me” “From: Me” under the tree.