It is becoming increasingly more expedient to try to “Yada Yada” our way through difficult situations.
“Yada Yada” - a phrase that has earned what appears to be a permanent space in the lexicon of American pop culture thanks to a Seinfeld episode, actually has its origins going back as early as the 1940’s as a means of expressing words, thoughts, or events deemed too tedious to be worthy of repeating. In Hebrew, one of the translations of the word "yada" is "to know" which is ironic since knowledge is what is usually trying to be avoided when this phrase is used.
As a leadership coach, I often encounter the “Yada Yada” in a variety of situations.
I wanted to try something new in my career...yada yada...now I’m more frustrated than ever.
I have a really difficult colleague on my team...yada yada… we’re meeting with HR on Tuesday.
My team never seems to understand the big picture… yada yada...we keep missing deadlines
My boss is impossible...yada yada… I’m updating my resume... again
Skipping to the End
In our high-speed, one-touch, “click here for immediate access” world, it is becoming increasingly more expedient to try to “Yada Yada” our way through difficult situations. Why? Because the alternative requires doing the serious self-reflection and inner work that we feel we’re too busy or perhaps, too frightened, to take on at the moment. Rather than addressing the underlying factors in a situation, we end up making a drastic change in hopes that by skipping to the end, we’ll magically get the outcome we want for our lives. While that may have worked in those old “Choose Your Own Adventure” books from childhood, it doesn’t translate well to real life.
The tricky part is that if you haven’t clearly defined exactly what you want the outcome to be, or how you personally are contributing to the recurring challenges in your life, eventually you end up right back where you started, more confused and frustrated than ever. If you aren’t happy in your current career, a new resume with fancy fonts and powerful keywords may help you get a new job, but if you don’t understand who you are, what motivates you, and what you want for your career long-term, don’t be surprised if you are using that resume again with 18 months in search of yet another shiny object with matching business cards. If your team never sees the big picture, you can put a new team in place, but if you aren’t able to clearly articulate the broader perspective to begin with, that new group will eventually exhibit the same behavior as the old.
It Begins with You
As a leader, in order to effect meaningful change, the work starts in the mirror. Although many may try, you can’t “Yada Yada” yourself in the connection between cause and effect or problem and solution. In fact, you are the only factor in most equations that you have complete control over, so in trying to avoid dealing with big pink elephant in the room [you], you’re actually allowing it to grow larger and more distracting. Ultimately, the “Yada Yada” ends up delaying achievement of the goal because you aren’t addressing the true challenges that have been holding you back.
The Question
So the next time you are tempted to skim over yourself and try to skip to the end, ask one important question:
“What am I avoiding?
If you are taking an action sheerly to avoid a particular outcome or aspect of yourself, that indicates your decisions are on some level based on fear, and that fear is connected to something deeper you have the ability to change. While it may not feel as expedient, for true long-term growth, the parts you want to “Yada Yada” over are where you can make the most significant impact.