In our media-crazy world filled with snarky humor (of which I am sometimes a guilty participant) and relentless cynicism (also sometimes me) it is unfortunate that when we see something in the media that is the exact opposite, it comes as a surprise.
Though I'm an engaged part of the Dad Blogger community, I will admit that when I see a commercial, TV show or movie that portrays modern fathers as bumbling idiots, it doesn't ruin my day. I may find it obnoxious and think about it briefly, but my mind is constantly scattered in 300 different directions between my kids, my job, laundry, bills, etc., so I don't have the bandwidth to dwell. I have pasta to boil for two hungry dudes.
Actress Mila Kunis made a joking proclamation to all expectant fathers earlier this week on Jimmy Kimmel Live to not say "we're pregnant" in reference to their expectant wife/girlfriend/partner, since men aren't the ones physically carrying the baby. She rapid-fired several other lame clichés influenced by her own current pregnancy, but the truth is if a man wants to feel engaged and a part of the 40-week process for which he is half responsible, she should realize that that's actually a good thing.
There are plenty of men today who are thrilled to play an integral role throughout both pregnancy and their children's lives, which is a big change from the Ward Cleaver-ish preceding generations. When Mrs. Dude was pregnant the first time, I attended every single OB/GYN visit that she did, which was close to an hour in the car each way through LA traffic. I could have skipped some and she wouldn't have minded, but I wanted to be involved. I was excited to be involved. I was determined to be involved.
The second time around I attended a few less, but that was primarily because we had a toddler at home who needed his own time and two hours in a car plus an hour in a tiny room with his mother in stirrups was not the ideal place for it. Fatherhood is fatherhood, and men should be able to say "we're pregnant!" if they want to. I don't know that I personally ever used Ms. Kunis' least-favorite phrase while in that situation, but to me, any man who is excited to become/be a father should be recognized positively, for fatherhood is just about the best gift possible.
Though she was funny in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, I wouldn't look to Mila Kunis for political, legal or medical advice, just as I wouldn't for parenting and/or pregnancy guidance. To me, the irony of the situation is that her fiancée/baby daddy Ashton Kutcher used to refer to his step-daughters (from ex-wife Demi Moore) as "my girls" and "my kids" in interviews while they were together, even though he married the girls' mother while they were teens and he wasn't much older. Though Kutcher is most famous for lifting dumbbells in That '70s Show and Dude, Where's My Car?, he's a savvy businessman and clearly an eager and engaged father. Selling out your guy for a cheap laugh, Mila? Dude, where's your clue?