Your Body, Your Birth

Your Body, Your Birth
This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email.

As a maternity nurse, I’ve worked in a lot of hospitals in my career and each one has a slightly different culture surrounding how laboring women and their babies are treated.

In each of these settings, I’ve seen that the culture is extremely important and what might seem like “routine safe practice” at one hospital might never be used elsewhere. It’s given me a very unique perspective on what’s actually important in caring for laboring women and what’s just a product of the facility’s “culture” of care.

All of this has led me to one important conclusion—the most important thing for women is finding a provider and a facility that matches their views on birth.

Now, I’m probably going to piss off A LOT of people here, but hear me out.

Do you want a scheduled C-section to fit in conveniently with your leave from work? Others might disagree with your view, but if it’s what works best for you and your family, then as long as you understand the risks and benefits, GO FOR IT!!!

Do you want to give birth squatting and delay cord clamping and have baby go skin-to-skin with you right after birth? Do you want intermittent monitoring and a delayed newborn bath and/or eye medication? GO FOR IT!!!

For both of these drastically different approaches to birth, there is a provider and a facility (hospital or birth center) who would be happy and willing to help you towards your goals to have the birth you envision.

Seriously, I’ve worked at facilities where both of the above scenarios are the norm. I’ve seen that both types of deliveries can be the best choice for different women.

Public Domain/Pixabay

Find a provider you trust

The problems come into play when your personal values on birth and newborn care conflict with that of your provider’s or the hospital’s! Inevitably, if you don’t trust your provider’s views about how you can (or will deliver) and you are bickering over various details in prenatal visits, it’s time to find another provider or facility for your baby’s birth!

Because imagine being in labor, in the middle of a contraction while fighting with your provider over what they deem as “necessary” treatment? If you don’t trust your provider and there really is something wrong, you might ignore their advice to the detriment of you or your baby’s health.

On the flip side, if your provider suggests something that’s necessary and you wholeheartedly disagree and don’t trust your provider but go along with their plan anyway, after the birth you may feel deceived, violated, or traumatized!

No one wants this! Providers don’t want to argue with patients and constantly explain themselves just to be trusted. Pregnant women don’t want to argue and constantly fight for their voice and values to be honored during one of the most important moments in their (and their family’s) lives!

Follow your instincts

So follow your instincts and do what’s best for you and your family. Work with a provider, doctor or midwife, at a properly equipped facility that matches your values as closely as possible. From that space, you can build a good trusting relationship with one or two people before your delivery. This way, when labor starts and you may be in pain and/or anxious to meet your baby, you and your partner aren’t fighting for the basic things you need to feel comfortable giving birth.

One thing my years of practice at different facilities—some that overly “medicalize” birth and some that take a natural process approach—has taught me is that women’s bodies and babies, when treated accordingly, often know exactly what to do to have a healthy delivery with minimal interventions from well-meaning providers!

But of course, everyone and every birth is different and the most important thing is to be flexible if things change course midstream and suddenly you’re being rushed to the operating room. As one of my colleagues says, “you didn’t spend your entire pregnancy avoiding soft cheeses and deli meats only to be too stubborn to get help when you need it for a safe delivery of your precious baby.”

Public Domain/Pixabay

Your body, your birth

Yet in order for the best outcomes for both mom and baby, I firmly believe you need to trust in your provider 100% and start from a place where your ideas, values, and requests are met as you work together as a team to bring your baby into this world.

Remember, it’s your body, your baby, and ultimately your birth, and the best doctors and midwives know it’s a privilege to help you in your journey towards motherhood!

Were you able to have the birth you wanted for your baby? I’d love to know your story!

Popular in the Community

Close

What's Hot