Nowadays it would seem that pursuing happiness has become more of a challenge, somewhat of a chore one would say, because in all honesty reaching a state of happiness can be hard work. Many of us go through a number of struggles in our everyday life that make it difficult to feel happy the majority of the time. Even if we manage to experience happiness, the moment is so fleeting, that we are sometimes left with just the memory of that feeling. Yet, it would seem that instead of continually doing the very same things that make us happy in the first place, we'd rather dismiss it, deeming it a rarity and continue to live with the belief that life is meant to be hard and that no one can be 100% happy all the time. So we succumb to the idea that difficulties, struggles, obstacles and hardships are a way of life and attached to it, there is undoubtedly, and unavoidable, feelings of sadness, frustrations and disappointments.
In most instances, unhappiness occurs when what one thinks would happen doesn't, thus creating unfulfilled expectations and often times these situations involve other people. Attempting to control an uncontrollable situation and expecting others to behave in a certain manner can lead to changes in our own behavior, moods and possibly lead to an uncharacteristic response. Nothing or nobody should have that much power over another person to the point that even their subconscious is affected. Of course there will be times when one is ¨caught in the heat of the moment¨ and ¨blowing off steam¨ is much needed, but allowing whatever it may be affect our mood, response and interaction with others, involved or not, is something we should avoid and strive to improve. We do this by working on our self-control, retaining what I call our ¨happiness quota" and becoming aware that our happiness is not dependent on others, but on oneself, and that we alone can choose to be happy despite the circumstances around us.
Could it be possible, then, for us to program our minds and heart to view happiness as a reachable goal not meant to be achieved sporadically, but one that can be attained independently on a daily basis, starting with small doses? Obtaining a happiness quota and incorporating it into our daily lives could help achieve this. What if we start each day with ten happiness quotas, for example, and make a conscious decision to maintain the quota at the highest level possible? If these quotas are viewed as tangible chips and each day we make it a habit to wake up with ten, we are already deciding to start each day feeling happy and ready to face whatever life throws at us.
Keep in mind that a quota, by definition, is a limited or fixed number of things, in this case of happiness. Considering the number of situations and people we encounter on a daily basis that can influence and alter our emotions, ten happiness quotas may not be enough for some people, especially those who struggle to contain negative emotions. However, with life providing us with an allowance of only ten happiness quotas daily, are we willing to give them away freely without much thought for every perceived negative situation we encounter? If we are committed to not losing any or the very least not give it away to those situations or people not worth it, then we are making a decision at that moment to remain happy regardless of what happens. The decision solely rests on us individually and by choosing to make happiness a priority, making a conscious choice to be happy and remain happy, we are allowing ourselves to let go of anything or anyone that can potentially disrupt our happiness and gaining greater control of our own feelings and emotions.