The United States has officially exhausted its supply of outrage and will begin borrowing massive amounts from China and Japan. "The Treasury has been using emergency measures for quite some time to conserve our ever-dwindling resources but, obviously, it wasn't enough," said Florence Didyall, Secretary of Moral Indignation.
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Now that Congress has agreed to an overall budget for the next two years and raised the debt ceiling until 2017, and the U.S. House of Representatives has a new speaker in U.S. Rep. Paul Ryan, the early conventional wisdom is that Washington has finally and mercifully turned the corner on governing by crisis.
Former President Bill Clinton and House Speaker Newt Gingrich called out today's would-be government shutdowners as a bunch of sissies. Reminiscing about the differences between the shutdown of 1995 and a potential one before the end of 2015, the two former leaders of their parties called out today's players.