After One Of Them Almost Died From A Fertility-Related Procedure, This Couple Decided Enough Was Enough
After one of them almost died from a fertility-related procedure, this couple decided that enough was enough.
We are women. We are people. We are not “less” in any way.
A recent study shows the decision is a conscious, ongoing conversation.
You’ll begin to feel like totally different people. Because you are.
"A childfree life is not a carefree life."
My body carried five babies I never had the privilege to bring to term. I also gave birth to two. One who died at age 14, and one who's chosen to live her life without my side of the family or me. So while I am biologically a mother, I'm functionally a "childless mother" on Mother's Day.
I'm all about women supporting and empowering other women, and when it comes to this topic, I often feel a divide.
Cutting greenhouse gas emissions from our personal carbon footprint will put all of us in some new, and potentially uncomfortable, situations as we move to more sustainable lifestyles. While it's culturally acceptable to go green in the lightbulb and light transit categories, other conversations remain marginalized.
I have no kids. Looking back on it, I see that my childlessness resulted from a combination of circumstances and nature -- but also some unfortunate decisions on my part. Or rather, the lack of decision. Sometimes inaction turns into a decision in itself.
Did you know that there is an International Childfree Day? First celebrated on August 1, 2013, its purpose is to recognize "amazing childfree people and their lives," and to "foster the acceptance of the childfree choice in today's society."
No matter how they arrived at having no children, women at this conference talked openly and honestly about the "Not Mom" aspect of their lives. They listened to many stories and life accounts that connected them as women who will never become mothers.
I've always wondered how our family portrait would ever be complete. How do I honor my three without my three here on earth? And then some photos from a few photographers starting showing up on my social media, a result of how much coverage Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month is getting this year.
In our world's most accepted definition of a parent, I will never meet the criteria. I will never birth a child and I am not adopting one. So you will call me childless. And, I will then emphatically and stubbornly correct you and let you know that I am a childfull parent, birthing a rare kind of parenthood.
At 52 years old, I'm a daughter, wife, stepmother, sister, aunt and friend. I am all of these things and I am grateful. However, the one thing I am not is a mother. Years ago, I made the decision not to have children. What I failed to do, however, was listen to the voice of my future self.
For women in the Otherhood, the term I introduced in my book of the same name for those who aren't part of the expected social norm of marriage and motherhood, whether by choice, or like me, by circumstance, our friendships are key.
Obviously my enthusiasm for the end of summer comes with different reasons, but I'm eager for your kids to return to school, nonetheless. Even now that I'm no longer a server/bartender/retail associate with my afternoons free, I've found a few stellar reasons to rejoice when the kids are back in the classroom.
And no, they won't "eventually" change their minds.