You set the tone. You teach your kids how to operate in the world. When you eat your veggies, when you manage your stress levels, when you set routines for yourself and honor them, consistently, your child naturally wants to follow suit. It all starts with you.

It's not selfishness to be able to appreciate how much your needs matter, how worthy of love and care you are. It's a gift.

With so many variables being out of your power, the one thing you are in control of is your well-being. Feeling any of this at any point does not mean you are suddenly a judgmental person who does not understand addiction. All of this does not mean you do not love this person unconditionally.