Handlebar Mustache

A mall in Seattle has hired "Hipster Santa" to rock blue jeans and a man bun while asking kids what they want for Christmas.
It was easy to see the spot had once been grand. I envisioned the well-heeled patrons sipping tea on its wide sweeping deck facing the sea, and a host of fashionably dressed ladies leaning over the balustrade to listen in on the conversations below.
I've had my mustache for thirty-three years and I'm now used to street urchins flinging orange peel and contumely in my direction. But, as we say, if you can't take the abuse, don't grow the mustache.