Elvin Snowdin wants out of the Northern Surveillance Agency.
The NSA was present at the discussion with Mr. Claus because we have so far utterly failed in our efforts to intercept and decode the "naughty and nice" database used at the North Pole. We felt this would be well within the national security interests of the government.
If the NSA is monitoring my phone calls I worry that they might not be correctly hearing what I'm saying. And, if this is the case, I worry even more, about what the resulting impact on my beloved U.S. of A. might be.
Kris Kringle died last night at his home in the North Pole. He is best known for his work as "Santa Claus" and "Saint Nicholas." When sarcasm grew in the 80s, his career tanked, marred by low-budget films starring Tim Allen.