One of the greatest things I learned in recovery is that it is none of my business what others think about me. Now, in theory not caring what others think is easy but putting it into practice is hard. Let's just say I fall short on many occasions.
What's really sad is that workaholism is socially respectable and even encouraged in many fields like law, medicine and on Wall Street.
This kind of paranoid and delusional thinking is called self centeredness. And self centeredness is at the root of taking things personally. Ultimately what we really have to do is realize that the world doesn't revolve around us!
Playing the victim is one of the most damaging character defects you can have because it affects your relationships, ambitions and success. You can't move forward in life!
The answer like many people will tell you is NOT to just suddenly think positive. I've got decades of this old thinking going on and it's not going to be cleared up but just thinking positively. I have to work on it. I have to practice living in the grey.