thinking fast and slow
Given how much coverage of the Pulse story has centered on what the candidates did and didn't say afterwards, clearly stories about domestic Presidential politics have taken precedence over stories related to the event itself (apart from stories of people dealing with personal tragedies, which have fortunately not been used to fuel partisan arguments - yet).
If you practice telling yourself the truth on a regular basis and in everyday interactions, it will strengthen your better self, and it will become easier to make conscious choices that feed the relationship, even when things get out of hand.
Daniel Kahneman is one of the most important thinkers on human decision making. The Princeton psychologist won the Nobel