As a life coach for troubled teens and unmotivated Millenials, I work with a lot of people with mental health issues ranging from anxiety to schizophrenia. What is really a great honour is to have people in their teens and twenties trust me enough to share their deepest thoughts about their lives with me.
Sometimes, these thoughts need to be shared. I am doing so now with permission.
Meet Reginald (Really? You think that there is a twenty-something schizophrenic living in Toronto in the 21st century named Reginald? No, it's not his real name.)
He is on a fair bit of medication which he takes consistently since we have been working together. Reginald has gone back to university and is following my regimen of taking one course in semester one, two in second semester, all the way up to five once he has learned how to study efficiently, prepare to write papers (not in the 24 hours before its due) and work with TAs and teachers when something doesn't make sense.
Regg is doing famously. He is also in a wheelchair, more round than tall and although when I met him he radiated "I know more than you" (which he often did), he now radiates the warmth, the grace, the brilliant humour which is how I know Reginald to be.
So here we are. Doing great at school (low 80s), contributing really well in class and what should come along? Valentine's day! And who is sitting next to him in class but a warm, sensitive woman who seems to "get" Regg's humour and he senses there is something there. Now remember, this is Reginald 2.0. Through the work we've done he has found new faith in himself and his self-worth has grown with every task we have set upon doing and succeeding or figuring out how to rise above.
They go for coffee. They share thoughts. They share fears. Esmeralda shares the fact that she used to be a cutter and then Reginald tells her that he was diagnosed with schizophrenia. Esmeralda's starts shifting uncomfortably in her seat, not making eye contact and shortly afterwards excuses herself due to a very bad headache. She also doesn't sit on the same side of class anymore.
I see Regg twice a week, which I do with all my clients, better to reinforce good habits and less time to acquire bad ones. We meet the next day and he shares the Esmarelda incident with me.
What do you say to someone who is the most thoughtful, astute, wise and sensitive guy you could know who has just had all his self-worth shattered. His greatest fears realized. "No one will ever love me for who I am."
This is not just the cry of all the Reginalds in the world. It is the call of a great many people out there who feel less than worthy.
I told Regg the simple truth: "Regg, you are special. There is no one like you and I feel honoured to work with you, laugh with you and learn from you. There is no question that there are other people out there like me who will see you for who you are and women who will not care about any labels you may have. They will fall in love with you."
You can't just give up because you haven't found love or met people who live their lives based on appearances or fear. You know that. Tell yourself: "I deserve to be loved. I deserve happiness and I will be patient and relentless in my pursuit of both." Say it again.
Say it everyday into the mirror while looking into your deepest self.
To all the Reginalds and the Esmeraldas out there: Keep your eyes sharp, your hearts open, your faith strong and your resolve everlasting and Happy Valentines Day to those who are loved and those waiting to know that there is a lover out there who will love them as they are.
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Love As You Age
Valentine's Day In Your 20s(01 of129)
Celebrating the day of love in your teenage years and 20s is more about social outings with potential for a future. People in this age group are more likely to exaggerate Valentine's Day and evaluate their relationships based on the size and price of gifts.Potential gifts: Anything from a singing telegram to the latest, most amazing gadget (credit:Shutterstock)
Valentine's Day In Your 30s(02 of129)
In your 30s, things get a little more serious and people's maturity levels tend to even out. Couples understand that love comes with responsibility, and they're likely to think seriously about settling down, if they haven't already. And in your 30s, your gifts may not matter that much. Potential gifts: A romantic getaway or sweet gesture will have a larger impact than a box of roses or jewelry. (credit:Shutterstock)
Valentine's Day In Your 40s(03 of129)
By the time you get to your 40s, it's no longer just about love. People in relationships want to be respected, understood and appreciated. If you're dating in your 40s, you're more likely to be open-minded and patient with the person you're interested in.Potential gifts: Something small and intimate, like the perfect table at a favourite restaurant, or a tasteful piece of jewelry, will speak volumes. (credit:Shutterstock)
Valentine's Day In Your 50s(04 of129)
In your 50s, love and V-Day become more unconditional — you've likely already been a lot and know each other's pluses and minuses. Couples in this age group are more likely to focus on respecting each other's needs and wants.Potential gifts: Planning a getaway together will probably be more appreciated than any small token. (credit:Shutterstock)
Valentine's Day In Your 60s(05 of129)
By the time you're in your 60s, V-Day just won't be a priority. In this age group, love is about fully accepting someone as they are and enjoying the simple things in life.Potential gifts: If you have grandchildren, gifts from them will really warm the heart, so arranging that for your partner will undoubtedly be appreciated. (credit:Shutterstock)
The Map You Didn't Know You Needed(06 of129)
There's nothing more romantic than mapping out where you met and putting it on a poster. Luckily for you, this wall creation incorporates both. Map Heart Poster Print, $21, available on Etsy
Cute-Enough-For Words Hooks(07 of129)
If your loved one has a love affair with retail shopping, help him or her stayed a little more organized with this adorable door hook. Over-The-Door Hook, $20, available at Umbra
Sexy Time(08 of129)
We all need more sexy time in our lives, and if you and your partner are looking for new ways to have fun in the bedroom, we suggest this game. 100 Sex Questions Game, $15, available at Urban Outfitters (credit:Urban Outfitters)
The Journal That Can Help You In The Long Run(09 of129)
How much do you know about your lover? This Q&A journal lets you ask fun questions and track them. And if you're thinking long-term, one book lasts three years. 3-year Journal for 2 People, $21, available at Overstock.com
The Soap Your Girlfriend Will Love(10 of129)
This handmade soap set from Etsy is natural, vegan and unscented. Perfect for those girlfriends who have a green thumb. Soap Set, $23, available on Etsy (credit:Etsy)
Cinnamon Hearts(11 of129)
Because it can't be the holiday of love without cinnamon hearts. Bulk up, people. Cinnamon Hearts, $5, available at Purdy's
More Sexy Time(12 of129)
If 2014 is about getting more creative and flexible, then you and your partner will both enjoy this playbook. Position of the Day, $13, available at Urban Outfitters (credit:Urban Outfitters)
The Cookbook That Will Give You A Sugar Rush(13 of129)
The perfect recipe book for all things cookies, pies, cakes and ice cream. If you've tried anything from Momofuku Milk Bar, we don't need to say anything else. Momofuku Milk Bar, $26, available at Amazon
Passport Cover For Lovers(14 of129)
If your wife or girlfriend is always on the go or lives in a different city, she'll appreciate this cute passport cover. Passport Cover with Hearts, $14, available at Chapters/Indigo
Love Poems That Will Make You Sound Awesome(15 of129)
Instead of just giving him or her a book of love poems, bookmark your favourites and read them to your love! Love Poems, $12, available at Chapters/Indigo
For The Lovers Of Scotch(16 of129)
If your partner loves a good drink, they'll love this glass and ice ball even more. On the Rock Glass and Ice Ball, $20, available on Chapters/Indigo
Surprise Spoons(17 of129)
Early mornings just got a little sweeter with this stamped spoon. Hand Stamped Dessert Spoon, $21, available on Etsy
For The Sweet Tooth(18 of129)
Maybe he or she isn't into cinnamon hearts. These hearts are not only more colourful, but they taste sweeter as well. Valentine Candy Heart, $6.50, available at Chapters/Indigo
A Book For Two(19 of129)
What would you without your loved one? This cute book shows you what it would be like if you didn't have your other half. (But in an adorable way, we promise). Me Without You, $10, available at Urban Outfitters
Retro Frame(20 of129)
A little retro and a little corny. But we like it. Me & You Heart Frame, $8, available at Urban Outfitters (credit:Urban Outfitters)
Before There Was Facebook(21 of129)
Look familiar? Before Facebook albums, there were these photo albums. Print out a couple dozen of the snaps you have of the two of you for an even better surprise.Kleer Vu Leatherette Photo Album, $22, available at Overstock.com
The Perfect Tablet Cover(22 of129)
If the lady or gentleman in your life loves his or her iPad a little too much, help them protect it with this leather case. Stand Leather Case with Bluetooth Keyboard, $29, available at Overstock.com
Comforting Heating Pad(23 of129)
For someone in need of some pampering time. These heating pads can be warmed up in the microwave and can help soothe aching body parts. Super Soft Flannel Corn Heating Pad, $10, available on Etsy
The Bracelet For A Cause(24 of129)
Not only will she love this bracelet, she'll love the fact that it was designed and made by women and girls who have escaped exploitation and abuse in Thailand.Turquoise & Wood Bracelet, $30, available through World Vision
Fancy Chocolate(25 of129)
A fancy box of chocolates for the fancy man or lady in your life. GODIVA Gold Ballotin, $26, available at The Bay (credit:The Bay )
A Pair Of Sunglasses(26 of129)
Your fashionista will adore these heart-shaped sunglasses.UO Heartbreaker Sunglasses, $16, available at Urban Outfitters
Cupcake Kit(27 of129)
Help your kitchen mess-maker create beautiful cupcakes with this adorable little kit. You can also help them clean up after. Cath Kidston Cupcake Kit, $16, available on Amazon.ca
The Dish That Says 'I Love You'(28 of129)
A dish for your keys, jewelry and maybe your heart? Valentines Day Trinket Dish, $12, available on Etsy
Spring Is Here(29 of129)
Make her room feel like a garden with this adorable hanging garland. If you want, set it up yourself and tell her she has a surprise waiting for her. Celebrate Decor Pink Lighted 8-foot Garland, $19, available at Overstock.com
Glass Bottle(30 of129)
If your honey likes to stay fit and go to yoga, she'll appreciate this glass water bottle. Glass Bottle, $20, available at Mountain Equipment Co-op
Bath Salts(31 of129)
There's nothing more calming than taking a long hot bath with scented bath salts. AHAVA Lavender Bath Salts, $25, available at The Bay (credit:The Bay )
Wall Art You'll Both Love(32 of129)
Love is all you need, but you may also need this wall art. Wall Decor, $30, available at Umbra
Socks(33 of129)
Dots, hearts, stripes and pink: When Valentine's Day turned into a sock. HOTSOX ORIGINALS Socks, $7, available on eBay
3D Puzzle For Two(34 of129)
Yes, a puzzle. How much fun would it be putting this masterpiece together? 3D Puzzle, $24, available at Overstock.com
A Card That Will Impress(35 of129)
We can all walk over to the card store and buy a Valentine's Day card ... or we can pretend we did it drunk. Hotch Potch I Lurve You Valentine's Day Card, $5, available at Urban Outfitters
For The High School Sweetheart(36 of129)
If you've been with your sweetheart for years and you both remember carving your names on trees as teenagers, it's time to recreate that artwork in the comfort of your home. Personalized Birch Vase, $22, available on Etsy
For The Amateur Baker(37 of129)
If your girlfriend or wife likes to dabble in the latest dessert recipes, get her this charming little pasty book. And yes, you can be her test subject. Miette: Recipes from San Francisco's Most Charming Pastry Shop, $19, available on Amazon (credit:Amazon )
For The Woman Who Likes Her Tea Time(38 of129)
This has 'aw' written all over it. If you feel like surprising your loved on on Valentine's Day with breakfast in bed, top it off with this cute handmade coaster. Heart Coaster, $9, available on Etsy (credit:Etsy )
For The Woman Who Loves Snooze Time(39 of129)
There's nothing more comforting than snuggling up with your partner after a long day of work. Make things a little more lovey-dovey with this custom pillow. XO with Heart Throw Pillow, $59, available on Overstock (credit:Overstock )
For The Lover Of All Things Mugs(40 of129)
We know she means a lot to you, but we also know how much she loves her mug collection. Give her something personalized on V-Day with this hand-illustrated mug.Custom Order Hand Illustrated Art Mug, $19, available on Etsy
For The Giggler(41 of129)
If your lame old jokes still make her laugh...she won't stop giggling at this cute poster. Heh. Mid Century BIRDS DO IT typography, $28, available on Etsy (credit:Etsy )
For The Woman Who Likes To Share(42 of129)
We all know sharing is caring, and if you still seem to learn something new about her on a daily basis, at least now you have a place to write things down. I Love You Activity Book, $12, available at Urban Outfitters (credit:Urban Outfitters )
For The Woman Who Lives Like A Royal(43 of129)
The classic and fancy tea that will make any girlfriend or wife feel like Kate Middleton. Don't forget the biscuits. Classic Citron Green Tea, $10, available at Chapters/Indigo (credit:Chapters/Indigo )
For The Woman Who Deserves Downtime(44 of129)
If going away for a relaxing retreat is out of the question (and budget), try an at-home massage kit and plan a night of relaxation. Conair Professional Percussion Massager, $44, available at Shop.ca (credit:Shop.ca )
For The Woman Who Can't Stand Winter(45 of129)
We get it, she hates winter. If your sweetheart gets anxious at the idea of leaving her house when it's cold, make things a little more bearable with this V-Day inspired scarf. Cozy Textured Eternity Scarf, $34, available at Urban Outfitters (credit:Urban Outfitters )
For The Woman Who Hates Valentine's Day(46 of129)
Not everyone loves the holiday of love. If your gal is anti-Valentine's Day, we're sure this hilarious phone case will either make her laugh...or just hate it even more. Cat iPhone 5 Case, $8, available on Etsy
For The Woman On The Go(47 of129)
Your girlfriend is busy, but her love for espresso shouldn't get in the way. This espresso set is designed for the person on the go. Handpresso 'Wild Hybrid' Outdoor Espresso Set, $255, available at Overstock
For The Woman With A Sweet Tooth(48 of129)
She may remember her Easy Bake oven or she may just have an obsession with mini doughnuts. Either way, she needs to have this in her kitchen. Nostalgia Electrics Cake Pop and Donut Hole Bakery, $30, available on Shop.ca
For The Woman With A Good Sense Of Humour(49 of129)
Squee! If the girl in your life knows how to handle a bad pun or a good joke, she'll love you even more for this adorable card. Valentine's Day Car, $5, available on Etsy (credit:Etsy )
For The Woman Who LOVES Chocolate(50 of129)
When we say love, we mean LOVE. Chocolate and Valentine's Day go hand-in-hand and if the woman in your life just likes it simple, treat her to a box of fair trade chocolate. Camino Fine Chocolates, $14, available at various grocery stores
For The Woman Who Needs A Break(51 of129)
Let your valentine lounge around at home and take bubble baths. These personalized robes are perfect for the woman who needs a break. Monogram Joy Robe, $30, available at Chapters/Indigo
For The Nature-Loving Woman Who Lives In The City(52 of129)
Does she love nature but live in the city? Bring a little bit of the outdoors to her urban life with this wooden bird house. White doves not included. Wooden Bird House, $41, available on Overstock
For The Lover Of Cute Things(53 of129)
There are some women out there who pay attention to detail. If your valentine is loves hosting dinners, buy her this custom embroidered tablecloth. Heart Tablecloth, $15, available at Simons (credit:Simons )
For The Couple Who Met In Winter(54 of129)
For some, Valentine's Day and winter time reminds them of when they first met. If you and your sweetheart met during cold months, warm her up with these adorable handmade gloves. Heart Gloves, Grey Gloves, $39, available on Etsy
For The Woman Who Likes Her Cup Of Joe(55 of129)
She may just love coffee more than you. If your sweetheart loves her morning cup of java, surprise her with this adorable mini coffee maker. Coffee Maker with Glass Carafe. $70, available at Williams-Sonoma (credit:Williams-Sonoma )
For The Woman Glued To Her TV(56 of129)
Whether she is into reality TV or sci-fi movies, keep her cozy with this 'Love is in my home' throw. Typeset Throw, $100, available at Simons
For The World Traveller(57 of129)
We all want to believe our love will last forever, so if you can't make it to San Francisco or another city with love lock displays, lock your own love lock in your neighbourhood or home. Lovelocks, $25, available at LoveLoveOnline
For The Woman Who Appreciates Homemade Goodies(58 of129)
Alright. If you really want to impress her on V-Day, we suggest making your own chocolates. White chocolate dyed with red and pink food colouring in particular. Chocolate Candy Mold, $7, available on Amazon
For The Woman Who Is Always Late(59 of129)
She may have a hard time keeping track of her schedule, but she'll love you for this heart-shaped gem clock. 'You Melt My Heart' Rhinestone Jewels Clock, $58, available on Overstock
For The Woman Who Likes To Match(60 of129)
Cheers to the happy couple. These matchy champagne glasses are the perfect touch for all those nights you cook dinner for her. Cathy's Concepts Contemporary Champagne Flute, $30, available on Amazon
Tassimo T47 Single Cup Home Brewing System - Black & Chrome(61 of129)
Price: $139.99Where to buy: Available in red at Target locations across Canada, and in black at major retailers including Canadian Tire, Walmart, Sears, Future Shop, The Bay, Home Outfitters and Bed Bath & BeyondHow many relationships have started with a simple, and predictable: “Would you like to grab a coffee sometime?” Delight your coffee crush with a Tassimo Coffee Machine and a Valentine’s card that says: “Let’s grab a coffee sometime…on you."
Vera Wang Be Jeweled Rouge(62 of129)
Price: 30 ml / $49.00 50 ml / $75.00Where to buy: Available exclusively at Shoppers Drug MartYou are only courting disaster if you give jewelry too early in the courting stage of a relationship. That’s why the Vera Wang Be Jeweled Rouge is the perfect alternative. The floral/fruity fragrance comes in a brilliantly cut, gem-like bottle that radiates sparkling pink and red colours for Valentine’s Day. Also, think of what Vera Wang is famous for: wedding dresses. That’s right, start planting those subliminal messages if you are serious about this one.
Palladium Pampa Sport Cuff Boot(63 of129)
Price: $120Where to buy: Palladium BootsHere’s a simple fact of life: Women like shoes. Here’s a lesser-known fact: Men are just as obsessed with their “kicks”. So there’s nothing odd at all about giving footwear for Valentine’s Day – especially if it is a sleek-looking and practical shoe such as the Pampa Sport Cuff boot from Palladium. It is stylish, it is waterproof, durable, and most importantly – it is pretty. For extra charm-points: Get yourself a matching pair and present the boots as part of planned winter hiking date, complete with hot chocolate and picnic basket. You’re welcome.
Cineplex And Bon Appétit Dinner And A Movie Package(64 of129)
Price: $30 Cineplex physical Gift Card* and $50 Bon Appétit Gift CardWhere to buy: CineplexA lot of secret admirers make the mistake of making their big move on their crush by asking: “Um, do you want to go out sometime?” Why not be more specific and enticing? How about: “Want to go to dinner and a movie on Valentine’s Day?” And if your crush is still unsure, seal the deal with plans to see one of the most anticipated romantic movies of the year: Winter’s Tale, which is fittingly set for release on Valentine’s Day. The movie stars Colin Farrell, Jennifer Connelly, Will Smith, and Russell Crowe – with an intriguing tagline that should get your crush in the mood for romance: “This is not a true story. This is true love.” Swoon.
My Own Fingerprint T-shirt(65 of129)
Price: Starting at $29.99Where to buy: My Own FingerprintIf you want to be a little creative with your gift, try giving your Valentine’s crush a t-shirt designed by a real life Crime Scene Investigator. The t-shirt has a standard fingerprint design but also comes with a fingerprint kit, allowing the recipient to create a custom t-shirt, watch, or hoodie, featuring their own fingerprint. It’s a perfect gift if your crush is into TV shows such as CSI, Dexter, Criminal Minds, etc.
Amzer Capacitive Touch Screen Knit Gloves(66 of129)
Price: $14.95Where to buy: Amzer.comNot only are these pink gloves really cute…they also show how caring you are. For instance, you’ve probably been flirting with your crush via text up to this point. These knit gloves will keep her hands warm AND still allow her to use her smartphone while texting you smiley faces on her touchscreen.
Dakota Women's File Clip Watch(67 of129)
Price: $27.83Where to buy: Overstock.comThis little trinket can act as four useful gifts in one. The Dakota File Clip Watch is a timepiece that can clip on to a purse, yet it also features a fold out nail file, magnifying glass, and thermometer. It’s an ideal gift for the busy woman on the go, or a female MacGyver.
Kobo Mini(68 of129)
Price: $49.00Where to buy: Kobo.comIf your crush is an avid reader, the Kobo mini is a perfect fit in their pocket. The device is light as a feather, has a 5” touch screen, and features built-in Wi Fi. You also have the ability to fill the Kobo mini with tons of free literature from eBooks. Reading can be a solitary affair, so if you want to use the Kobo mini to help you get a date with your crush, try pre-loading book titles that have been turned into movies. Then start a book/movie comparison club with your crush. Start out with books that have been made into movies currently in theatres, then advance to older books that are now DVD titles.
WeMo Switch + Motion Sensor Bundle(69 of129)
Price: $79.99Where to buy: Belkin.comThe Belkin Wi-Fi enabled WeMo Switch and WeMo Motion Kit isn’t a very romantic gift. But it is extremely practical, useful, and will score points if your crush is into cool techy innovations. The devices give your crush wireless control of their home appliances and electronics, turning devices of their choice on or off as soon as movement is detected. The WeMo Switch and WeMo Motion Kit makes it easy to set schedules for home appliances and electronics and turn devices on and off remotely from a smartphone. It’s a thoughtful gift for the person who is often forgetful.
Landing Mr. Right Board Game(70 of129)
Price: $34.95 Where to buy: Landing Mr. RightIt’s been said that girls list “humour” as the most attractive trait in a guy. Put that theory to the test with a fun gag gift on Valentine’s Day. Landing Mr. Right is a board game that helps women look at love and dating in a humorous and positive light.The game takes players on a virtual dating journey to find “Mr. Right.”Throughout the game, players will be asked to answer questions and share stories about their dating experiences. When the game is over, players can review their date cards and may discover something new or even decide to date a different type of guy out in the real world. We're not saying this is in any way realistic, but this screams 'romantic comedy' if you can rig the game to make sure you are Mr. Right.
Darth Vader Heart Tee(71 of129)
For the guy who is proud of his inner nerd. Get it here, (credit:Etsy)
vday16(72 of129)
For the woman who likes to look cute while she sleeps. Get it here. (credit:Etsy)
Red Scarf(73 of129)
For the woman who likes to wear a pop of colour when she bundles up. Get it here. (credit:Etsy)
Lip Plumper(74 of129)
For the woman (and her significant other) who loves keeping her lips soft. Get it here. (credit:Etsy)
Heart Cufflinks(75 of129)
For the guy who wears his heart on his sleeve, literally. Get it here. (credit:Etsy)
Heart Signet(76 of129)
For the guy who likes to take things way too literally. Get it here. (credit:Old Hollywood)
Vintage Chucks(77 of129)
For the guy who won't wear any other kind of shoe, so it may as well be red. Get it here. (credit:Etsy)
Vintage Velvet Skirt(78 of129)
For the woman who loves to think she lives in the world of "Mad Men." Get it here. (credit:Etsy)
Heart-Shaped Sunglasses(79 of129)
For the woman who loves to have fun with fashion. Get it here. (credit:Etsy)
Pug Love Tote Bag(80 of129)
For the woman who has a thing for cute dogs and wants the world to know it. Get it here. (credit:Etsy)
Heart Bralette(81 of129)
For the woman who definitely does not want lingerie for Valentine's Day. Get it here. (credit:Etsy)
Vintage Suitcase(82 of129)
For the guy who likes to look stylish when he travels. Get it here. (credit:Etsy)
Pillow(83 of129)
For the woman who wants to live as if she's in Paris. Get it here. (credit:Etsy)
Bird And Leaf Necklace(84 of129)
For the woman who has enough heart and love necklaces. Get it here. (credit:Etsy)
Domestic Gadgets(85 of129)
We’ve all heard a story about how so-and-so’s father made the mistake of giving Mom a toaster/blender/vacuum. Yet, it still happens. Giving your partner anything that suggests that their place is in the kitchen is a sure way to discover that your place is sleeping on the couch. If it’s commonly listed on a wedding gift registry, it’s not a good Valentine’s gift. (credit:Shutterstock)
Trashy Lingerie(86 of129)
This is a gift for the giver more than the receiver. You know it, your girlfriend knows it, and the sales clerk at Victoria’s Secret knows it. And please avoid the edible undies. A pair of granny panties and a box of Fruit Roll-Ups ultimately have the same function, and would go much further to show you care about her comfort. (Note: Do not buy your girlfriend granny panties and Fruit Roll-Ups.) (credit:Shutterstock)
A Dog (Or Cat, Or Rabbit, Or Chinchilla…)(87 of129)
Her YouTube history is full of ah-dorable puppy videos that elicit frequent squeals of “aww, I want one!”, but that isn’t a cue for you to spring a spaniel on her. Long-term pet ownership is a major decision that you can’t make for her. Unless you’ve seriously talked about this as a couple, you shouldn’t be cutting breathing holes in a cardboard box anytime soon. (credit:Shutterstock)
Gift Card(88 of129)
These are designed to be an afterthought, so much so that stores keep them at the check-out counter so you’ll buy them on the way out. To put it another way: if you resort to this as a Valentine’s Day gift, you’ve pretty much checked out of the relationship. (credit:Shutterstock)
Cheap Bath Products(89 of129)
No-name bath sets are for office Secret Santa desperation, not the love of your life. If she’s a fan of a particular brand or store, then a mini-haul of her favourites will be a hit. But the bar of purple soap in her shower isn’t a directive for you to buy “lavender stuff.” Rule of thumb: if it comes in a cellophane-wrapped basket and contains a free loofah, it’s a cop-out. (credit:Shutterstock)
Random Tools(90 of129)
Your partner may love tools as much as he loves you, but not just any hardware store purchase will please him. Yes, that name-brand mitre box is on sale, and you’re pretty sure he doesn’t have one. Thing is, he already has a mitre saw. So you’ve just purchased something that will only ever come in handy if he has to urgently install crown moulding during a power outage (credit:Shutterstock)
Stuffed Animal(91 of129)
Ever go to a carnival and see the guys carrying around the giant Rastafarian bananas they won for their girlfriends? And notice how as the evening goes on, those same guys look like they resent the stupid things more and more? You’re begging for a long, drawn-out version of that. Sure, the teddy bear is cute at first. But on Feb. 15, the red lace heart it’s holding is already out of date. And then you start wondering how long you have to keep it displayed on your dresser to prevent hurt feelings. Answer: forever. (credit:Shutterstock)
Book Of Homemade Coupons(92 of129)
This may have worked for Mother’s Day after you blew your whole allowance on Garbage Pail Kids cards, but no matter what your financial situation, you’ll have to do better than this. A stapled booklet of promises to give her a back rub, run her a bubble bath, or – even worse – do household chores is both cheap and easy. If you can’t invest the cash, at least invest some time and effort. (credit:Shutterstock)
Exercise Equipment(93 of129)
“Happy Valentine’s Day. Now get off the couch, tubby!” That’s the message you’re sending with an exercise bike or a gym membership. If they want to shape up, they’ll do it when they’re ready, and you can show your support by joining them or just encouraging them. In the meantime, leave their love handles alone. (credit:Shutterstock)
Gag Gifts(94 of129)
You’re not like some of those sappy, lovey-dovey, annoying couples, and you agree that Valentine’s Day is a pretty dumb idea. But if you’re ever going to express your love sincerely, this is the day. If one of you buys the hilarious novelty condoms and the other buys a thoughtful, elaborate gift? Think long and hard about how the night will end. (Spoiler alert: you won’t need the condoms.) (credit:Shutterstock)
Blanket(95 of129)
What it is: LoveBumper H20-OHH BlanketWhy you'll want it: A blanket doesn't sound like the sexiest of gifts, but this one — meant specifically to make sex in, let's say, more original spots like the kitchen more comfortable — has the best of both worlds. It looks innocent, but can lead to lots of naughty fun.Find it here. (credit:Come As You Are)
Racy Valentine(96 of129)
What it is: Victoria’s Secret Bombshell push-up bra, matching 'cheekini' panty and waist cincherWhy you'll want it: There's no question this is one sexy get-up — without going all the way into costume territory. For women who love lingerie, this will be a fun outfit for a special occasion.Find it here. (credit:Victoria's Secret)
Musical Accompaniment(97 of129)
What it is: VibroPod Digital Music Stimulator VibeWhy you'll want it: This toy is meant more for one person than two, so can work perfectly for long distance relationships. It hooks up to an iPod to vibrate in rhythm with songs, so we're imagining a complete package of playlist and Vibe, delivered just in time for February 14.Find it here. (credit:PinkCherry)
G-Spot Seeker(98 of129)
What it is: Silicone Handmaiden G-Spot SeekerWhy you'll want it: If you haven't figured out the magical g-spot yet, maybe this Valentine's Day is the time. This four-inch g-spot finder includes massaging tips and a silicone base. Find it here. (credit:http://www.adultsensations.ca)
Floral Dream(99 of129)
What it is: Aubade's bra and pantiesWhy you'll want it: Sexy with a leopard print twist, Aubade's take on Valentine's Day fun can slip comfortably under a sweater and jeans — until later.Available at Linea Intima.
Candles(100 of129)
What it is: Low Temperature Drip CandlesWhy you'll want it: If you've ever tried to use "normal" candles for some dripping wax good times, you know things can get a tad hotter than you'd like. These options, in a three-pack, mean no emergency trips to the hospital (and a slightly uncomfortable explanation).Find it here. (credit:Come As You Are)
Beads(101 of129)
What it is: Lia Anal Love Beads in PinkWhy you'll want it: Just like being struck by Cupid's arrow, enjoy this sex toy, featuring a silky finish, with your loved one this Valentine's Day. Find it here. (credit:PinkCherry)
Pasted On(102 of129)
What it is: Edible Body Pasties in Cinnamon HeartWhy you'll want it: These pasties can make for a fun surprise when your partner least expects it (and they also come in strawberry, cherry, even beer).Find it here.
Striped Lingerie(103 of129)
What it is: Freya's Taylor Charcoal Moulded Plunge BraWhy you'll want it: For fuller busted women who like a bit of coverage, this option still has plenty of sex appeal.Find it here.
The Whip(104 of129)
What it is: Twinkle Lover's Riding CropWhy you'll want it: Perfect for the holidays, this heart-shaped wand is designed for the naughty lover in your life.Find it here. (credit:Stag Shop)
Deck Of Cards(105 of129)
What it is: The Fantasy Sex DeckWhy you'll want it: If you and your partner are interested in finding more fun in the bedroom but aren't quite sure where to start, this deck gives you 50 options — and a built-in activity for Valentine's Day.Find it here. (credit:Come As You Are)
Fondue Set(106 of129)
What it is: Swiss Moo 7-Piece Chocolate Fondue SetWhy you'll want it: Who doesn't like the idea of dessert in bed? This seven piece fondue set is the perfect way to spoil your lover with everything sweet. Find it here. (credit:www.bedbathandbeyond.com)
Bath Fun(107 of129)
What it is: Bathtub Love GameWhy you'll want it: Maybe a bubble bath together is one of your Valentine's Day traditions ... or maybe you just want it to become one. But these baubles that go in the tub will give you plenty of ideas for what to do after — or for that matter, during.Find it here. (credit:PinkCherry)
All Day Long(108 of129)
What it is: Saxx Underwear's 24-Seven BoxerWhy you'll want it: Men's underwear is all-too-often neglected, but why shouldn't he get something he feels great slipping into on Valentine's Day as well? This particular option from Saxx is known for its long-lasting comfort.Find it here. (credit:Saxx)
Lace Love(109 of129)
What it is: WonderBra's chantilly lace bra and pantiesWhy you'll want it: Because there's plenty of sex appeal here — with a price (approximately $40) that leaves plenty of room for other expenditures.Available at the Bay and department stores. (credit:WonderBra)
Bath Bomb(110 of129)
What it is: Sex Bomb Why you'll want it: It's all in the name. If you're just looking for a way to relax on the big day, take a hot bath with your loved one with these exploding (and scented) bath bombs. Find it here. (credit:LUSH)
Rose Petals(111 of129)
What it is: Rose Petals Why you'll want it: If you're idea of V-Day is all about the romance, start your evening right with a trail of rose petals for your partner. And hey, they may not be the real thing, but think about how many times you can reuse these. Find it here. (credit:Stag Shop)
Sweet And Spicy Lingerie(112 of129)
What it is: Freya's Ashlee Candy Moulded Plunge Bra, Suspenders And PantiesWhy you'll want it: This lingerie may look innocent, but the combination of suspenders, knee highs and a bra that's sexy no matter the colour will drive any partner crazy.Find it here. (credit:Freya/Facebook)
Body Paint(113 of129)
What it is: Strawberry Body Point Why you'll want it: Get creative with this edible strawberry flavoured body paint that can be used to draw doodles, paint over sensitive areas, and eaten later. Find it here. (credit:Chapters/Indigo)
Shower Heads(114 of129)
What it is: Sex in the Shower Dual ShowerheadWhy you'll want it: Because when it comes to hot showers, two heads are always better than one. Find it here. (credit:http://www.adultsensations.ca)
The Travel Sized Duck(115 of129)
What it is: I Rub My Duckie Why you'll want it: Maybe you're going away for a weekend and you're not sure how to spice up things in the shower. This waterproof (and frankly, unrecognizable) vibrator is the perfect addition to any mini vacation. Find it here.
Barely There(116 of129)
What it is: Victoria's Secret Very Sexy Lover Lace demi bra and matching 'cheekini' pantyWhy you'll want it: It's hard to tell from this shot, but those 'cheekini' panties are the perfect offset to, well, the perfect butt. Admire, and be admired, we say.Find it here. (credit:Victoria's Secret)
Body butter(117 of129)
What it is: Cake Angel Food Body Butter Why you'll want it: Have your cake, and eat it too. Find it here. (credit:http://www.adultsensations.ca)
The Book(118 of129)
What it is: Why you'll want it: Because sometimes, you just have to go back to the basics. This newly illustrated edition is a perfect gift for those who like a challenge. Find it here. (credit:Chapters/Indigo)
Tradition Meets Sex(119 of129)
What it is: Victoria’s Secret Very Sexy Rose Corset and matching 'cheekini' pantyWhy you'll want it: What is it about corsets that are so sexy, for both the wearer and the watcher? This one, with its oh-so-sweet pattern could likely work equally well under a dress or sweater as a sexy accent, but we think it would do just fine on its own too.Find it here. (credit:Victoria's Secret)
Packing(120 of129)
What it is: MyPakage Weekday underwearWhy you'll want it: Specifically designed to cradle the most delicate part of men's bodies, this underwear is soft, supple, and it doesn't hurt that it's pretty flattering from behind as wellFind it here. (credit:MyPakage)
Tape(121 of129)
What it is: Purple Fantasy Bondage TapeWhy you'll want it: Maybe you don't feel so confident in your ability to tie knots, or frankly, just like how much easier it is to use a tape roll. But for bondage purposes, this is simple, and yes, even reusable.Find it here. (credit:PinkCherry)
Lube(122 of129)
What it is: Nature Lovin' Lube Honey Bear Why you'll want it: Some honey for your honey. This naturally sourced lube is equipped with health enhancing ingredients in a perfectly squeezable bottle. Find it here. (credit:PinkCherry)
Scalloped Edges(123 of129)
What it is: WonderBra's scalloped lace bra and microfibre briefWhy you'll want it: The support, the coverage, and the pretty pattern — this is lingerie that any woman would feel beautiful and sexy in, and more than happy to show off.Available at wonderbra.ca. (credit:WonderBra)
The Extender(124 of129)
What it is: G-Spot Finger Extender Why you'll want it: If size matters, today's your lucky day. This waterproof finger extender is the perfect toy for that extra special intimate experience. Find it here. (credit:Stag Shop)
Oral Sex Lover(125 of129)
What it is: Sqweel Oral Sex StimulatorWhy you'll want it: It doesn't vibrate and it doesn't thrust. But if the thought of multiple tongues gives you multiple fantasies, this is the perfect Valentine's Day gift for you and your loved one.Find it here. (credit:www.adultsensations.ca)
Massage Lotion(126 of129)
What it is: Mini Liquid Love Why you'll want it: Forget liquid courage, this holiday is all about the love. This warming massaging lotion is available in chocolate cherry, passion fruit and blue raspberry. Find it here. (credit:Stag Shop)
A Robe(127 of129)
What it is: Celia Mesh KimonoWhy you'll want it: The woman in your life will appreciate this mesh kimono robe, topped with lacing detail. Find it here. (credit:La Vie En Rose )
Red Hot Lingerie(128 of129)
What it is: Simone Perele's bra and pantiesWhy you'll want it: If you're going to go with a theme, it doesn't get much more Valentine's-y than red and pink underwear with a lacy twist. Plus, it's rather gorgeous, isn't it?Available at Linea Intima. (credit:Linea Intima)
Lip Balm(129 of129)
What it is: The Kiss Lip Balm Why you'll want it: Before you lock those lips, freshen up with this vegan-based lip scrub and lip gloss. Find it here. (credit:LUSH)