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I Was Bullied, Suicidal Then Found My Voice As An RCMP Officer

I was paralyzed in my bed. I remembered my dream to be a police officer because I wanted to help people and here was this young man, who wanted nothing more than to be accepted for who he was, taking his own life. I decided that I was going to be more than someone reading headlines, hoping the world became a better place. I decided to go out there and make a difference myself.
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Stop Bullying

When I was five years old, I had a dream that I wanted to grow up and become a police officer. If you had asked me then, or if you ask me now, I would tell you it's simply because I want to help people. This dream remained with me for many years.

Growing up, I lived in a broken home. My father was a "high functioning alcoholic, I had a terrible stepmother and I was horrifically introverted. My stepmother believed that "kids don't belong upstairs" and made me stay in the basement. It was four cement walls, a cement floor, no Internet or fancy electronics -- just a small black and white TV Already being terribly shy, being limited to the basement did not help. I had no one to talk to, confide in or support me. I was alone.

Going to school was equally as bad. Being so shy made me the target of many youth. They discovered that all they had to do was call me a couple of bad names and I would break down crying. When I say crying, I mean a river from my eyes, shoulders shaking, unable to breathe and certainly not able to communicate.

I went through this unbearable isolation both at home, and at school, from the age of six through 17. I felt depressed, alone, and at times, thought of suicide. I felt that no one liked me, no one wanted to be my friend.

I took each day one at a time until I was 17 when the stepmother was screaming at me. Something inside of me had enough and I walked out of the house with only the clothes on my back. I ran away. I have lived on my own since.

At the age of 33, I finally decided to apply to the RCMP. I was accepted and am truly living my dream in Surrey, B.C. I am a very proud Mountie.

On Oct. 17, 2011, I read a story about a 15-year-old boy named Jamie Hubley who killed himself. He bullied relentlessly for years because he was a figure skater, and later openly gay.

I was paralyzed in my bed. I remembered my dream to be a police officer because I wanted to help people and here was this inspirational young man, who wanted nothing more than to be accepted for who he was, taking his own life. I decided that I was going to be more than someone reading headlines, hoping the world around me became a better place. I decided to go out there and make a difference myself.

I connected with Hubley's father who gave me his blessing to share his son's story with the world. I created my own website for Bullying Ends Here and then decided to start speaking to local youth on my days off and at my own expense. I really thought this would be a very small initiative one or two days per month. But what happened is that one teacher told another who told another.

In just a few weeks, the media picked up on what I was doing. The RCMP also recognized that this was getting big and they quickly became my biggest supporter. I was offered an opportunity to work on this initiative full-time to see where it might lead.

At each presentation I share the details of my private life and growing up. I then tell Hubley's story as though he is still with us. When I reveal that he committed suicide because of the bullying for being "unique," this is where I share that I too am gay.

I challenge the youth to reflect on themselves and see if something inside of them just changed for the negative towards me. If so, they have some serious work to do. I tell them about how I created this entire project for them. I tell them that I have been gay the entire time speaking to that point and that I like them no matter their thoughts on me are.

I accept them for who they are and I will help them when needed whether they like me or not. They can't take that away from me. I challenge them to look in the mirror and ask themselves: "Was I the very best person I could have been today" and then challenge themselves to be better tomorrow.

I also challenge them to help those who won't speak for themselves -- the victims. I tell them to stand up to the bully or, in the very least, tell an adult. Be the voice for the victim. Be someone's hero!

In only five months, I have travelled across Canada and spoken to over 15,000 youth. I have received four emails from students stating that I saved their lives.

I remember what it is like to feel alone, depressed and suicidal. I know what it's like to have addictions in the family, to have a crappy home life and to not feel loved. I remember what it is like to be young which is why I am so passionate about this.

School Bullying Incidents
Cequan Haskins(01 of36)
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Chilling video of 10-year-old Cequan Haskins being viciously bullied on a school bus in May 2011 was released publicly by the boy's mother at a press conference in Appomattox County, Va. Video of physical and verbal abuse goes on for 40 minutes and includes racial and sexual slurs, as well as Cequan screaming as two 15-year-old boys allegedly hold a hot cigarette lighter to his skin. (credit:WSET)
Nadia Ilse(02 of36)
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To ward off school bullies who began taunting her in the first grade for her ears, Nadia Ilse begged her mother at the age of 10 for an otoplasty -- an operation to pin her ears back. At the age of 14, Nadia was granted her wish by the Little Baby Face Foundation, a charity that provides free corrective surgery to children born with facial deformities. (credit:CNN)
Isabella Lounder(03 of36)
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Isabella Lounder, a 7-year-old student with special needs, was afraid to return for her first day of school in the fall of 2012. Mother Nicole Lounder says Isabella, who has dwarfism, was ignored by school officials, wetting her pants numerous times after failed attempts to use toilets that were out of her reach. Students would also pick her up, hurting her arms, and she was once locked out of the school. (credit:KHOU)
Indiana Teen(04 of36)
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A student from Franklin Township Middle School East in Indiana was arrested after a cell phone video of a vicious school bus fight was posted to Facebook in August 2012. The fight broke out when one student had taken a seat on the bus that another wanted. (credit:FOX 59)
Washington Teen(05 of36)
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A Washington state student was terrorized in a bullying attack by peers -- and at some points, by the teacher. The incidents occurred in February at a Gig Harbor middle school. Cell phone footage shows more than a dozen students dragging the then-eighth-grade boy around the classroom, carrying him by his arms and legs, burying him under chairs, writing on his feet and stuffing his socks in his mouth. The antics last about 15 minutes while teacher John Rosi watches, and later joins in. (credit:KING 5)
Katie Uffens(06 of36)
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Katie Uffens left Westview High School earlier in 2012 and enrolled in a home-school charter program after she was told about the existence of a group called the “KKK” — short for the “Kill Katie Klub.” But the 16-year-old San Diego cheerleader who was repeatedly bullied by her peers says the taunting continued even after she dropped out. (credit:ABC News)
Dalton Fleenor(07 of36)
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Oklahoma high school junior Dalton Fleenor reportedly told another student -- while away from campus -- “What he did was a p---- thing to do,” referring to a fellow classmate. The next day at school, the classmate in question punched Fleenor twice in the back of the head. Both students faced suspension, as Newcastle High School treated the incident as a case of bullying. (credit:KWTV)
Whitney Kropp(08 of36)
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Whitney Kropp, a Michigan 16-year-old sophomore, was the victim of an apparent prank by classmates. Kropp was named to the homecoming court of the 800-student school in the fall of 2012, but said she felt betrayed after some students suggested her selection was a joke. She said she had been picked on in the past, but it intensified afterward. (credit:AP)
Preston Deener(09 of36)
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Preston Deener, a sophomore at Brunswick High School in Maryland, was the victim of a bullying attack in October 2012 just as he was preparing for an on-camera interview with a local television station about his experience being bullied. (credit:News 4)
Karen Klein(10 of36)
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Karen Huff Klein, a bus monitor for the Greece School District in Greece, N.Y., received an outpouring of support after a ten-minute video of her enduring vicious bullying while watching over students on a bus ride home was uploaded to YouTube. (credit:YouTube)
Stormy RIch(11 of36)
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Stormy Rich, an 18-year-old Florida student, says she was punished in May 2012 after reporting bullying of a special needs student on a school bus, and standing up to those bullies when the school didn't take action. (credit:WOFL-TV)
Rachel Ehmke(12 of36)
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Rachel Ehmke, a 13-year-old seventh grader in Mantorville, Minn., died April 29, 2012 after hanging herself at her home. The months leading up to the tragedy were a whirlwind of peer abuse instances, her parents say. (credit:KARE)
Akian Chaifetz(13 of36)
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In April 2012, Stuart Chaifetz sent his 10-year-old son Akian to New Jersey's Horace Mann Elementary School wearing a hidden audio recorder, uncovering verbal and emotional abuse from his son's classroom aide and teacher. (credit:Stuart Chaifetz)
Joel Morales(14 of36)
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Joel Morales, a 12-year-old student in East Harlem, New York City, hanged himself in May 2012 after bullies at school taunted him for his size, intelligence and the death of his father. (credit:Facebook)
Darnell "Dynasty" Young(15 of36)
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Darnell "Dynasty" Young, a 17-year-old gay student at Arsenal Tech High School in Indianapolis, Ind., faced expulsion in May 2012 after he fired a stun gun at bullies he claims were about to beat him up. (credit:Indianapolis Star)
Oklahoma Student(16 of36)
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A 14-year-old student from Longfellow Middle School in Enid, Okla., was left seriously injured and had to undergo surgery after an incident of bullying went too far. (credit:Facebook)
Corey Pingeton(17 of36)
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Cory Pingeton, an 18-year-old student at Franklin High School in Franklin, Mass., required medical attention in April 2012 after an unnamed suspect viciously attacked him in the school's hallway. After fleeing the campus following the attack, the suspected assailant now faced criminal charges. (credit:WCVB)
Julio Artuz(18 of36)
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15-year-old Julio Artuz in November 2011 spoke out about his special needs teacher bullying him, filming an encounter with the teacher at Bankbridge Regional School in New Jersey. (credit:NBC Philadelphia)
Ohio Boy(19 of36)
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A 10-year-old Ohio boy in April 2012 brought a BB gun to school to fend off bullies. (credit:WCPO)
Sawyer Rosenstein(20 of36)
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New Jersey student Sawyer Rosenstein received a $4.2 million settlement from the Ramsey school district years after a bully's punch paralyzed him for life. (credit:CastTV)
Female Students(21 of36)
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In March 2012, two female students from Mooresville High School in North Carolina were suspended after another student used her cellphone to film the girls viciously bullying a male student on a school bus. (credit:WBTV)
Lennon Baldwin(22 of36)
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15-year-old Lennon Baldwin, a freshman at Morristown High School in New Jersey, committed suicide in April 2012, and police are investigating whether bullying was to blame. (credit:CBS New York)
David Pecoraro(23 of36)
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David Pecoraro, a math teacher at Beach Channel High School in New York, was reassigned to an administrative office after video of him swatting at and spitting on a student surfaced online in February 2012. (credit:YouTube)
Kaleb Kula(24 of36)
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Kaleb Kula, a sixth grader with autism, was brutally beaten to the ground at his Maryland school bus stop in January 2012 while his peers stood by to watch -- and catch the act on camera. (credit:WMAR-TV)
Warren Lewis(25 of36)
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Warren Lewis, a Houston teenager accused of shooting a classmate in the leg at school, said in January 2012 that he was defending himself from a group of boys who had been bullying him. (credit:ABC 13)
Phoebe Prince(26 of36)
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A lawsuit brought by the parents of Phoebe Prince, a 15-year-old Irish immigrant in Massachusetts who committed suicide after relentless bullying, was settled for $225,000 in December 2011.Correction: A previous version of this slide incorrectly stated the date of settlement. (credit:Fox News/Newsy)
Restraining Order(27 of36)
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Kentucky mother Joy Furman claims her 9-year-old daughter has been bullied for two years at school, and seeks a restraining order against a fourth-grade boy she accused of tormenting her daughter, kicking her in the chest and chasing her with scissors. (credit:WDRB)
Ashlynn Connor(28 of36)
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In November 2011, 10-year-old Ashlynn Connor hanged herself in her closet by a scarf, just a few weeks after she told her mother she was being bullied at Ridge Farm Elementary School in Illinois and her mother denied the girl's request to be home schooled. (credit:WTSP)
Kelly Chafins, Christy Wilt(29 of36)
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Kelly Chafins and Christy Wilt of Miami Trace Middle School in Ohio were caught on tape in the fall of 2011 verbally abusing a 14-year-old special needs student. Chaffins resigned and Wilt was scheduled to undergo a probation period as well as eight hours of mandatory training in "how to recognize child abuse and stop bullying." (credit:WBNS)
Patty Fabian(30 of36)
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In October 2011, 15-year-old Patty Fabian was left with black eyes and a broken nose after a peer at Garland High School in Texas viciously assaulted her. Video of the assault was posted on YouTube while Fabian was rushed to the hospital. (credit:NBC DFW)
Rebecca Arellano, Haileigh Adams(31 of36)
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In the fall of 2011, Rebecca Arellano was crowned Patrick Henry High School's first lesbian homecoming king. The next day, her girlfriend Haileigh Adams was crowned queen. Despite widespread support from the school and the couple's friends and family, the couple subsequently received waves of hateful phone calls and emails. (credit:ABC News)
Nicolette Taylor(32 of36)
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In the fall of 2011, 13-year-old Nicolette Taylor from Long Island decided to get plastic surgery after enduring online harassment and name-calling multiple times a week because of the shape of her nose. (credit:ABC News)
Jamey Rodemeyer(33 of36)
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Taunted since grade school for hanging out with girls, 14-year-old Jamey Rodemeyer told his parents things were finally getting better since high school started. Meanwhile, on a blog his parents didn't know about, he posted increasingly desperate notes ruminating on suicide, bullying, homophobia and pop singer Lady Gaga. A few days later, he hanged himself outside his home in suburban Buffalo, quickly gaining a fame like that described in one of his idol's songs. (credit:YouTube)
Justin Aaberg(34 of36)
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15-year-old Justin Aaberg committed suicide in July 2010 after what his mother Tammy Aaberg says was relentless anti-gay bullying at his Minnesota school. Tammy Aaberg has since gathered signatures for a petition and marched to the office of her congresswoman, Republican Rep. Michele Bachmann, to call on Bachmann to publicly address gay bullying. (credit:MSNBC)
Zachary(35 of36)
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When video of 15-year-old Zachary being beaten over and over again by a classmate went viral in October 2011, the school told the gay teen that he need to "tone [himself] down." The school's handling of the attack outraged Zach's mother Becky Collins, who couldn't understand why officials would say her son needed to change, instead of the bullies. (credit:WBNS)
(36 of36)
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