Spanx 'Arm Tights' Are The Newest Way Women Can Feel Bad About Their Bodies

What. Is. Happening.
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Spanx, known for its organ-squeezing garb, recently took things to a new level by launching tights. For your arms.

Err. What?
Spanx
Err. What?

The brand’s website calls Arm Tights (patent pending) a “non-shaping garment,” but they are made completely from hosiery, which pretty much teeters on comical levels of SNL’s “Baby Spanx” parody proportions.

Touted by the brand’s website as being “five years in the making and hundreds of prototypes later,” the crop top promises to give you an “incredibly lightweight, comfortable, second-skin feeling.” Huh.

A release from the brand states it debuted the top in response to “overwhelming consumer demand,” and calls it a perfect way to “cover up for those who typically shy away from sleeveless shape.”

We’re all about layering in cold weather, but this whole thing just feels like an unnecessary way to once again tell women they have body parts that need covering up.

Friendly reminder: You do not need shapewear, and you don’t need anything to be squeezing your arms. Ever.

The item comes in a whopping 10 colors so you can be chic while also constricting. Sigh.

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