Do you remember what it was like hearing words of encouragement from your parents? Or hearing your parents say "I'm proud of you?" Those were good times. To hear your parents tell you how proud they are of you. Nothing else came close as a child.
People today don't talk to their children like the parents in the past. Maybe because parents today think that children do not pay attention to what they have to say, but that isn't so. They listen, they might not show it, but they do. And it isn't just our words that children pay attention to either.
Our children pay attention to our actions also. A child who grows up with one or both parents who smokes, ends up with a child who probably will smoke. The same goes for drinking, children who grow up in a household where one or more parents drinks, they have a good chance of being a drinker themselves . . . whether they are a social drinker or a problematic drinker.
We know what it's like to not be heard or to be ignored. The last generation or two has come from families who has had to have two incomes to survive; they also come from a one-parent household . . . usually run by a single-mom (but not necessarily always). So, we went without a lot, we went without a lot of attention from our parents.
Children need certain things in life and it's the parent's job to provide. Children, whether it's the children of yesteryear or the modern child, they need the necessities of life: Food, shelter, and clothing.
Besides the physical things for survival, they need the emotional things for survival also. For their emotional survival, we need to talk to our children. Words are important. Words can build a child up or knock them down.
I've made a quick list of things children need to hear from their parents.
•I love you
•I'm proud of you
•I'm sorry
•I forgive you
•I'm listening
Using these words correctly is paramount. These words will do wonders for a family if they are used correctly. But you can't just say them once and never again, they have to be said on a regular basis and by that I don't mean in a way that seems like it is scheduled; say them when the situation appears that the words are needed. To be affective, you have to sit with your child, one on one and talk, whether it be at McDonalds or in their bedroom. But don't just talk, listen also. Let the child do the talking and you do the listening for once.
What do you think? Let me know in the comments. Thanks!