Alternative Facts (the song)

With her now infamous January 22 appearance on Meet The Press, Kellyanne Conway, counselor to President Trump, demonstrated that she and her boss operate comfortably in a post-truth world, where "alternative facts" are the new coin of the realm.

With my February 12 song Alternative Facts, I explore their brave new world in three minutes, using just three chords and one (apologies in advance) 3 Doors Down reference.

Alternative Facts
(M. Farmer)

Well, two plus two is five
Frederick Douglass is still alive
Vladimir Putin had nothing
To do with those hacks
Alternative facts

I was quick to condemn the Ku Klux Klan
My executive order's not a Muslim ban
They were clapping in New Jersey 
For the 9/11 attacks
Alternative facts

BRIDGE
I'll tell you up is down and black is white
And every little thing is gonna be alt-right
The truth is gonna be whatever I say
Call me Mango Mussolini
Or just Il Duce

I really care about working class folks
Global warming is a Chinese hoax
3 Doors Down is one of our greatest
Rock-n-roll acts
Alternative facts

You know Mexico is gonna pay for that wall
My great big hands can palm a basketball
And when my audit's done
I'll tell you what I paid in tax
Alternative facts

BRIDGE
I'll tell you up is down and black is white
And every little thing is gonna be alt-right
The truth is gonna be whatever I say
Call me Mango Mussolini
Or just Il Duce

My thoughts and prayers go out to Bowling Green
I'm the least racist person that you've ever seen
I've always had a great relationship
With the blacks
Alternative facts

I've got a real good handle on foreign affairs
We need guns in our schools to kill grizzly bears
And you know Kellyanne is the queen
Of the mendacious flacks
Alternative facts