As seen on The Red Shtick.
Doctors say a Houston man is lucky to be alive after overwhelming his brain by concurrently being a supporter of the police and a critic of police brutality.
Physicians at Houston Methodist Hospital report 29-year-old Trey Curtis is recovering from surgery to repair a massive brain aneurysm brought on by Curtis being simultaneously pro-law-enforcement and against the excessive use of force by cops.
“The young man really is fortunate to still be with us,” said Dr. Todd Trask, the neurosurgeon who repaired the nearly fatal blood vessel rupture. “It was such a mess in there, it’s a miracle we managed to save him. It was almost like his head exploded from holding those two sentiments at the same time.”
Trask explained how the average American’s brain simply isn’t equipped to handle thinking that police are a necessary force to keep law and order in a civil society while also thinking that police brutality erodes the public’s trust and needs to be addressed.
“Most Americans have a very low capacity for nuance. Their brains are geared for stark, black-or-white views of issues. Trying to grasp intricacies, especially regarding hot-button issues, can overload the brains of millions of people in this country. It’s just too much for too many people,” Trask warned.
While Trask admitted some American brains may be able to safely hold both pro-cop and anti-police-brutality viewpoints, he strongly discourages the “extremely risky” practice among those in and from the U.S.
“You may think your brain can handle backing the badge concurrently with condemning excessive police force, but there’s no reliable way to determine whether you can do so safely,” Trask maintained. “That’s why we urge all Americans to hold only one attitude or the other.”
Trask said overwhelming the brain’s capacity for nuance can result in all sorts of neurological ailments, such as deadly brain aneurysms, debilitating brain seizures, and crippling brain cramps.
As for Curtis’ prognosis, Trask said his outlook is good, as long as he steers clear of being contemplative about complicated issues.
“He should make a full recovery,” Trask predicted. “Hopefully, others will learn from his ordeal and avoid being thoughtful when it comes to complex societal problems.”
Follow Jeremy White on Twitter: @comicref