That's the name of a class I spoke to recently at John Jay College for Criminal Justice. I showed the class and spoke about a recent hour I produced for "48 Hours Mystery" about a lawyer who killed his wife, abused his three ex-wives and threatened to shoot and kill his teenage daughter. This kind of thing, I said, is all too common.
I mentioned to the class that there was a story going on in NYC about an ex-cop Eddy Coello (who is now a physician's assistant of all things) who is suspected of killing his wife Tina Adovasio. The couple, who have a five-year-old daughter together, were often heard verbally fighting in their apartment, according to neighbors, and Tina had recently contacted a lawyer to investigate divorce proceedings and take out a restraining order. She didn't pull the trigger, the lawyer said, because Coello promised to get counseling.
Now Tina Adovasio is dead, her body found dumped in some woods in Westchester County. She also has three other children by a first husband who will grow up without their mother. Her husband Eddy Coello is the so-called "person of interest." Everyone knows what that means. In fact, he's now been arrested for Tina's murder.
The thing is, Coello has another child too and lived for a time with a woman named Glory Perez, and the NY Daily News ran an exclusive interview with her. That interview is a textbook example of the way an abuser works and the way a victim feels. Talk about the psychology of the victim -- here it is in black and white. Perez recites the abuse she suffered including being hit so many times she can't remember how many, and having a loaded gun put to her head.
One paragraph really jumped out at me. Glory Perez spoke of walking on eggshells around her ex. I hear that line all the time from abused women. And then Perez went on to say, "I tried so hard to do nothing wrong. I thought if I could just be perfect, maybe he wouldn't get angry."
Ladies, if you find yourself thinking that, take your kids, your valuables, grab your car keys, walk to the door and leave immediately. It's already too late.