A father walking his daughter down the aisle at her wedding is a moment that many brides look forward to. But for those who have lost a parent, a day and tradition that are meant to be joyous can also be painful reminders of their loss.
Still grieving after her father died unexpectedly in 2011, newlywed Paige Eding knew he somehow had to be part of her big day. For her June ceremony, they planned a moment of remembrance, but the 23-year-old Zeeland, Mich., resident longed for a stronger connection.
So she called her wedding photographer, Kari Wieringa of Zander & Breck Photography, with what some might see as an unusual request -- adding a stop at her father's grave site to the busy schedule on the day of her wedding.
"I wanted it captured," Eding said. "I wanted to have that lasting memory."
Wieringa wasn't fazed. Rather, she could empathize with Eding.
"I lost my mom when I was seven," she said, "so I understand her desire to go do that."
When they visited the cemetery, a group of family members hung back and Wieringa stayed about 20 feet behind Eding as she approached her father's grave.
"It all seemed pretty normal, she looked fine, and so we're standing there and I'm ready to take pictures, and she just fell," Wieringa said.
"It was a moment of longing and wishing for him," Eding said. 'I was so sad that he wasn't there physically ... but I was also joyous. ... Through my family, he still lives inside of each one of us."
Courtesy Zander & Breck Photography.
"I didn't even know she had the camera to her face," she said. "Everyone else didn't exist."
Later that day, Eding's grandfather walked her down the aisle to her husband, Kevin Eding, whom she said her father Mark Winia would have approved of.
"In the short time they did get to spend together they instantly bonded," she said.
After the wedding, Wieringa saw the photo and was immediately touched. She asked Eding's permission to put it on her Facebook page.
"I wanted to share it because it was so moving, and that's the type of photography I really love. When 7,000 people had seen it I called her and asked, 'Do you want me to take this photo down?' It's such a personal moment ... I felt very protective of Paige."
With 700 Facebook fans, Wieringa never thought the photo, now with more than 700,000 likes and 34,000 shares, would go so far: she said Facebook stats showed that more than 20 million people had seen it. Comments and emails poured in, thanking Weiringa for sharing the photo and telling her how it resonated with them.
The attention also came with negative reactions, too. When the image found its way to Reddit, some commenters said it was "tacky" or in poor taste to have the moment photographed and shared online.
Others asked, Wieringa noted bewilderingly, if they could have her permission to recreate the image for their own wedding pictures.
"I didn't pose it; I don't own the pose," she said. "I don't own that moment."
Wieringa, who has three young children and describes herself as a stay-at-home mom, began taking photos when her first son was born. She works to capture life as it is, she said, though often has trouble getting clients on board with her desire to focus on the unplanned moments. But she said they often end up appreciating the candid shots more.
"They want something they can blow up huge on the wall, picture perfect, but life's not like that," she said. "I have a two-year-old crying at my leg all the time, and I want that image, because that's life."
"I think it's because I lost my mom," she added. "I really crave those images of watching my mom interact with me or my brother."
So far, as Wieringa works, Eding has only seen two photographs: the shot at her father's grave and another where she's kissing her husband.
"I've got my dad and my new husband. If she only took those two photos, I would be happy in life," Eding said.
"Kevin and my dad, they're so alike," she said. "When's the sun's not shining they'll be your sun. It's a quality that I love to remember in my dad and that I'm so lucky to have in my husband."
Courtesy Zander & Breck Photography.
First Look Photos
Stephanie & Kenneth(01 of75)
Open Image ModalStephanie & Kenneth(02 of75)
Open Image ModalStephanie & Kenneth(03 of75)
Open Image ModalStephanie & Kenneth(04 of75)
Open Image ModalKait & Jade(05 of75)
Open Image ModalKait & Jade(06 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Benj Haisch Photography
Kait & Jade(07 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Benj Haisch Photography
Kait & Jade(08 of75)
Open Image ModalRachel & Conan(09 of75)
Open Image ModalRachel and Conan share one last hug before seeing each other.Photo Credit: April + Paul
Rachel & Conan(10 of75)
Open Image ModalRachel & Conan(11 of75)
Open Image ModalConan fights back tears as he sees how radiant Rachel looks.Photo Credit: April + Paul
Rachel & Conan(12 of75)
Open Image ModalRachel & Conan(13 of75)
Open Image ModalRachel & Conan(14 of75)
Open Image ModalKate & Kyle(15 of75)
Open Image ModalKyle’s jaw drops when he sees Kate.Photo Credit: Joe Elario Photography
Kate & Kyle(16 of75)
Open Image ModalKate & Kyle(17 of75)
Open Image ModalDanaea & Mike(18 of75)
Open Image ModalDanaea & Mike(19 of75)
Open Image ModalDanaea & Mike(20 of75)
Open Image ModalDanielle & Kyle(21 of75)
Open Image ModalDanielle & Kyle(22 of75)
Open Image ModalDanielle & Kyle(23 of75)
Open Image ModalLauren & Jason(24 of75)
Open Image ModalJason can’t believe his eyes when he spots Lauren.Photo Credit: Charlie Juliet
Lauren & Jason(25 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Charlie Juliet
Lauren & Jason(26 of75)
Open Image ModalLauren & Jason(27 of75)
Open Image ModalHe’s so wowed that he takes a lap around Lauren to check out her gorgeous gown.Photo Credit: Charlie Juliet
Lauren & Jason(28 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Charlie Juliet
Sara & Mike(29 of75)
Open Image ModalMike gets a little giddy as Sara approaches.Photo Credit: Jacob Arthur Photography
Sara & Mike(30 of75)
Open Image ModalSara & Mike(31 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Jacob Arthur Photography
Renee & Brett(32 of75)
Open Image ModalA huge grin crosses Brett's face when he turns around.Photo Credit: Ventola Photography
Renee & Brett(33 of75)
Open Image ModalAnd then the tears start streaming!Photo Credit: Ventola Photography
Renee & Brett(34 of75)
Open Image ModalBrett’s emotional reaction takes Renee by surprise.Photo Credit: Ventola Photography
Renee & Brett(35 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Ventola Photography
Rosa & Doug(36 of75)
Open Image ModalDoug feels like the happiest man in the world upon seeing Rosa.Photo Credit: Julie Pepin Photography
Amanda & Brett(37 of75)
Open Image ModalAmanda and Brett didn’t plan on having a “first look” moment. After getting ready in separate rooms, he knocked on her door to ask a question. When she opened it, his jaw dropped!Photo Credit: Sarah Culver Photography
Jen & Moe(38 of75)
Open Image ModalMoe can’t control his massive smile when he sees Jen.Photo Credit: Brandon Kidd Photography
Jen & Moe(39 of75)
Open Image ModalCarrie & Chip(40 of75)
Open Image ModalChip’s face lights up when his beautiful bride approaches.Photo Credit: Allyson Wiley Photography
Carrie & Chip(41 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Allyson Wiley Photography
Janelle & Dennis(42 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Joe Elario Photography
Janelle & Dennis(43 of75)
Open Image ModalJanelle isn’t afraid to show how thrilled she is to be marrying Dennis.Photo Credit: Joe Elario Photography
Damaris & Donald(44 of75)
Open Image ModalAfter checking out her beautiful dress, the couple shares a warm embrace.Photo Credit: Jasmine Star Photography
Sonya & Eric(45 of75)
Open Image ModalEven a tough former football player like Eric Barton can get a little teary-eyed on his wedding day.Photo Credit: Jasmine Star Photography
Jody & Shannon(46 of75)
Open Image ModalBoth Jody and Shannon are overcome by emotions.Photo Credit: Jasmine Star Photography
Cindy & Jelani(47 of75)
Open Image ModalJelani’s awestruck expression makes our hearts melt.Photo Credit: Jasmine Star Photography
Laura & Adam(48 of75)
Open Image ModalAdam dissolves into happy tears when he sees Laura.Photo Credit: Jasmine Star Photography
Jess & Preston(49 of75)
Open Image ModalJess & Preston(50 of75)
Open Image ModalJess & Preston(51 of75)
Open Image ModalJill & Jordan(52 of75)
Open Image ModalJill & Jordan(53 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Husar Photography
Jill & Jordan(54 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Husar Photography
Jill & Jordan(55 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Husar Photography
Jill & Jordan(56 of75)
Open Image ModalKatherine & Ted(57 of75)
Open Image ModalKatherine & Ted(58 of75)
Open Image ModalTed’s jaw drops when he spots Katherine.Photo Credit: Maria Angela Photography
Katherine & Ted(59 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Maria Angela Photography
Lisa & Benny(60 of75)
Open Image ModalLisa makes a grand entrance down the venue’s cascading staircase.Photo Credit: Pickerill Creative
Lisa & Benny(61 of75)
Open Image ModalMelissa & Cory(62 of75)
Open Image ModalCory can’t wait to see his beautiful bride.Photo Credit: Joe Elario Photography
Melissa & Cory(63 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Joe Elario Photography
Melissa & Cory(64 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Joe Elario Photography
Rebecca & Felipe(65 of75)
Open Image ModalPure joy crosses Felipe’s face when he turns around.Photo Credit: Blink of an Eye Photography
Rebecca & Felipe(66 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Blink of an Eye Photography
Rebecca & Felipe(67 of75)
Open Image ModalPhoto Credit: Blink of an Eye Photography
Sarah & Evan(68 of75)
Open Image ModalSarah and Evan both stop in their tracks upon spotting each other, savoring the moment.Photo Credit: Joe Elario Photography
Sarah & Evan(69 of75)
Open Image ModalStephanie & Michael(70 of75)
Open Image ModalStephanie & Michael(71 of75)
Open Image ModalStephanie and Michael choke back tears as they share a sweet moment.Photo Credit: K & S Photography
Jenny & Daniel(72 of75)
Open Image ModalA first look doesn't need to be overly emotional to be memorable. Jenny and Daniel join together for a quick toast before the ceremony.Photo Credit: Erin Lindsey Images
Jenny & Daniel(73 of75)
Open Image ModalKaelin & Justin(74 of75)
Open Image ModalKaelin and Justin choke back tears when they first spot each other.Photo Credit: Andria Linquist
Kaelin & Justin(75 of75)
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