Gates/Crowley In An Alternative Universe

Let's visit an alternative universe where the protagonists behaved in a slightly more reasonable manner during their fateful confrontation.
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There are physicists who believe that all quantum possibilities -- every point on what they call the "wave function" -- actually come true in some universe, somewhere. Right now, guys, at some point in the cosmos a parallel you could be in a hot tub, sipping champagne with your longtime girlfriend, Jessica Biel.

Let's apply this to the Henry Gates race controversy, and visit an alternative universe where the protagonists behaved in a slightly more reasonable manner during their fateful confrontation.

HENRY GATES: Yes, officers, what's the problem?

SGT. CROWLEY: Afternoon, sir. We got a call that some people were using their shoulder to push open the front door, and we just wanted to make sure everything was alright.

HG: Yeah, it's fine, I live here. This is my house. The door was stuck, so we tried to get it unstuck. I ended up having to go around to the back to get in.

SC: Would you mind showing us some identification, sir?

HG: Sure, but tell me you're not making me do this because I'm black. I just flew back from China, and I'm tired and cranky, and I don't want to deal with any of that.

SC: Absolutely not... (looking at ID)... Professor Gates. I've had a tough day myself. We're just here to try and make sure your home is protected.

HG: Alright, then. I'll take your word for it and won't get upset.

SC: (smiling) Good, because then I'd have to take you in.

(Both men laugh)

HG: So are we good?

SC: We're good. Have a nice evening, Professor.

HG: You, too. Hey, you wanna come in for beer?

SC: Nah. Maybe some other time.

(You should also note that in this universe, the cable news channels have had a slow week.)

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