Numbness & Confusion

What would you do if you realized that you couldn't feel -- if you realize one day that you've gone completely numb? Try as you might, you can't feel happy or sad, excited or anxious. What would you do if you couldn't find it in yourself to laugh or even to cry? What if all the emotions you once took for granted were suddenly gone, leaving you utterly devoid of feeling?

I think it's quite normal to wish this at times. Sometimes you just don't want to have to deal with all the complicated emotions you face. I've had moments where all I wanted to do was to run away from a jumbled up mess of teenage emotions. When you're a teenager, everything tends to feel confusing.

We know that we can't have someone else live our lives or face our trials for us. We hear of adults who remember their teenage years as one of the happiest times of their lives and we wonder what we did wrong to end up this way. We are told that we'll all get through this somehow. Apparently, we will emerge out the other end, older, hopefully smarter, and if all goes well, maybe even wiser.

We want to believe this. We want to believe this badly. But there's always a part of our minds that doubts and therefore wishes we could go numb. This can make these adolescent years tough and at times isolating. But that doesn't stop us from trying to reach out. We desperately hope that we're not alone in what we face, and that we are what all teenagers and young adults strive for -- normal.