A horrible truth: You can't belly-laugh while having sex. At least I can't anymore.
Most of us did not have this problem in our teens, twenties or thirties. You could gag on guffaws and bounce back in seconds, minutes. Now you might bounce back in three days if you're lucky.
Please take this age-related affliction very seriously. Sex is funny enough without cracking jokes and acting silly. Stop with the whoopee cushions.
I watched a couple of episodes of Masters of Sex, then read the book instead so it would be over quicker (M & J would probably want to treat me for premature mental ejaculation if they were alive and found out). As far as I can tell, never did they ever do any research or perform any experiments with clown noses. Sure, bags were put over subject's heads while they did this or that, but can you reach orgasm while wearing Donald Duck or Goofy masks? These are the important questions.
I'm no sex therapist, and aware that said malady has a sample size of one (although my guess is that many cases go unreported, and a pandemic may develop as the worldwide population ages). So, I've put together some practical tips for avoiding hysterical giggling and acid reflux during foreplay and copulation:
- Remove all zany paraphernalia you may have in the bedroom (Halloween costumes, joy-buzzers, funny hats, wind-up toys, funhouse mirrors, velvet Elvis wall-hangings, etc.) and put them in a closet in another room (unless you also have sex in the other room).
Follow these simple rules. If we all work together, I think it's possible to beat Bozo Syndrome -- and have a happy, fulfilled sex life at fifty and beyond.
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