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An Optimist Who Was Six Figures In Debt

An Optimist Who Was Six Figures In Debt
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Founder of the International Institute for Emotional Empowerment

Founder of the International Institute for Emotional Empowerment
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Being in debt is bad enough. Being six figures in debt puts a choke hold around your neck. How did I arrive at the astronomical number of being six figures in debt? Well, it was through a combination of good old denial and a lot of wishful thinking.

So, what do you do when you have the tendency to wear rose-colored glasses? Should you throw them away? Absolutely not!

I'll share with you how I went from making $20,000 a year to knocking off that debt in nine months (without robbing a bank!).

First, shift from being an optimist to become an optimistic-realist. Optimism is a gift if used with awareness. My optimism, unfortunately, included a lot of wishful thinking. I am an entrepreneur, which also makes me a dreamer. However, I couldn't become a successful business owner until I dug deep into reality and remained there.

Optimistic people don't like to remain in realities that feel overwhelming. But each year, around tax season, there was no avoidance. The facts were squarely presented to me; I was getting buried further and further in the debt.

After each tax season, I told myself I was going to change this by working harder and budgeting more strictly. And so I did. You know the drill; you stop clothes shopping, except for basics at Target. The rare chance we "splurged" by eating out at Panera or Noodles still meant telling the kids, "Sorry, no lemonade, just water." And even though I used these measures and put in more hours, the bottom line STILL did not change.

That was until I decided this debt absolutely MUST stop.

The question is what really changed, because I made a decision after each traumatic tax season that showed my accumulating debt to change. The real change was tapping into emotions in a powerful way. The first few times I saw the debt, I was extremely sad. How could this have happened to me? I questioned.

Thankfully, after years of feeling sad and nothing changing, I got angry. Anger is a great emotion when used in an empowered manner. My anger guided me to grow up and show up differently. Rather than whine or try to wishful think my way out of this problem, I started taking bold action. You see, when anger isn't used to blame others or your circumstances, it puts a fire in your belly that makes you push past your comfort zone.

The fire in my belly was determined to put an end to the debt for good. I gave myself one year to do it. You can imagine I was absolutely besides myself when the debt was gone in nine months.

You may have heard that change occurs when people make a decision. I used to think, I make decisions all the time and still, nothing changes. What is different is putting empowered emotion into that decision, while remaining in reality with an optimistic view of the future.

Teaching how to use our negative feelings as fuel to our thoughts and desires is an absolute vital aspect to creating positive and lasting change.

12 Things Every Woman Should Know About Money
From Alexa von Tobel(01 of12)
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Diversify Your Investments“Don’t put all your eggs in one basket” can be applied to investing. Spread your money to minimize your risks if a company doesn’t perform as well as expected. This way, you’re also exposed to different assets and will get more gains for your future. Watch. (credit:Alamy)
From Suze Orman(02 of12)
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Make Small Changes To See Big ResultsOne of the biggest money hurdles is getting in control of your money. Instead of making drastic changes -- and falling off the wagon -- track your spending and incorporate new habits slowly. Do you go to the movies once a week? Try going every two weeks. Grab a coffee at Starbucks each morning? Brew your own twice a week. The small savings will add up. Watch. (credit:Alamy)
From Maria Bartimoro(03 of12)
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Know How Much To Save And How Much To InvestIf you’re ready to get your feet wet into the stock market, start slow and keep building. You want to be able to put your money into an account and not have to withdraw it. Forget rock-bottom savings account rates for all your money -- put 20 percent into a savings account and the other 80 percent into the stock market. As you get closer to retirement age -- and less willing to take risks with your retirement money -- the percentages will become 50/50. Watch. (credit:Alamy)
From Alexa von Tobel(04 of12)
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Take Advantage Of Compounding InterestToo often, women forget about the power of compounding interest. The earlier you start saving, the less you’ll have to save in your 40s and 50s for retirement. It’s not magic, just math. Watch. (credit:Alamy)
From Alexa von Tobel(05 of12)
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Negotiate A Higher SalaryIt’s critical to negotiate your salary -- no one else is going to do it for you. Research what people in similar industries and job roles are making, and present it to your supervisor. If your company can’t provide you with more money, you can still negotiate: can they provide you with more vacation days or allow you to work from home once a week? These extra perks might offset a lower paycheck. Watch. (credit:Alamy)
From Suze Orman(06 of12)
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Forget About Cashing In Your 401kIf you think of the money sitting in your 401k as an emergency fund or savings account, think again. Withdrawing money early will result in paying taxes just like you would your normal paycheck. Additionally, you will pay both a 10-percent federal tax penalty and a state tax penalty. Watch. (credit:Alamy)
From Trae Bodge(07 of12)
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Save Money On Your Online ShoppingMake saving money when shopping online a breeze with Bodge’s favorite app, Invisible Hands. This handy program does the price-checking research for you, and will alert you when a different site has a better price -- or let you know that you’ve found the best deal. Watch. (credit:Alamy)
From Maria Bartiromo(08 of12)
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Avoid Financial Rip-OffsWhen choosing what to invest your money in, if it looks too good to be true, it probably is. Remember that you’re investing and saving for the long term, not to get rich overnight. Watch. (credit:Alamy)
From Alexa von Tobel(09 of12)
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Decide Whether To Rent Or BuyBuying a home is not only an investment, but a permanent tie to a location. More importantly, it can limit job opportunities by making you location dependent. If you’re uncertain about whether you’ll be in the same city in 5-8 years, it’s best to rent. Watch. (credit:Alamy)
From Trae Bodge(10 of12)
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Cut Back On What You Want, Not What You NeedIdentifying what you need versus what you want is an easy way to cut back on spending. You need food -- but ordering out instead of eating the leftovers in your fridge is a want. By being honest with yourself about what you actually need to spend money on, you can start to save. Watch. (credit:Alamy)
From Maria Bartimoro(11 of12)
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Don’t Pay Down Debt With More DebtIf you’re trying to pay down debt, avoid taking on more debt -- forget taking out a loan or getting a new credit card to pay another off. Instead, keep paying off debt as your priority, and with each paycheck, add a few extra dollars to your payments. There are no shortcuts, but making on-time payments above the minimum will help you pay your balances as soon as possible. Watch. (credit:Alamy)
From Trae Bodge(12 of12)
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Save At The Grocery StoreWhen you’re shopping for groceries, look at the unit price, not just the price per item. While that box of cereal might be $1 cheaper than the other brand, it might also contain less. Use this strategy for boxed items, meats and cheeses -- you’ll save more than by just looking at size differences or brand. Watch. (credit:Alamy)
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