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The 11 Most Attractive Things Men Do Without Even Realizing

The 11 Most Attractive Things Men Do Without Even Realizing
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What makes a man attractive might have less to do with how hard he tries, and more the things he does without even realizing.

That seems to be the conclusion of a Reddit thread where user porotart asked female users: "What do men do that's attractive, that men don't know about?"

The resulting comments covered everything from being kind to animals to driving a stick shift, and the majority of the responses weren't actions or traits specific to men. Our main takeaway? Small gestures matter the most.

As Tracy Moore at Jezebel put it: "It's not tough guy power tripping or dick-swinging, just small, good things that demonstrate basic good personhood: caring, passion, kindness, and using the advantages of cultural masculinity for good."

Here are the 11 most attractive things a man can do, according to Reddit users:

1. Be kind, especially to strangers. Whether that's tipping the delivery guy extra when it's raining, pulling over to help someone with car trouble or holding the door open for someone with their hands full. As one user wrote, "Catching you doing something that shows your character... sexiest thing ever."

2. Laugh out loud. Because who isn't attracted to someone who finds joy and humor in the world? For one Redditor, "Genuine, uncontrollable laughter makes me want to kiss them."

3. Roll up their shirtsleeves. Redditors love forearms, which are "the equivalent of boobs for women" and "swoon-worthy."

4. Go gooey-eyed. The way someone looks at you can be very telling. One Redditor loves "When [your partner's] eyes get all sparkly when they first see you" -- who wouldn't?

5. Speak passionately. Commenters on the thread were in agreement that the topic is less important than the way they talk about or argue for it. One user wrote: "When my [significant other] talks excitedly about anything he cares about, even if it isn't really one of my interests, it is insanely attractive to me."

6. Hold a conversation. Being able to make "intelligent conversation" is a seriously underrated point of attraction. (For anyone who needs help, there's an app for that.)

7. Concentrate hard. "I love the look a guy has on his face when he is trying to figure something out," one user wrote. No know-it-alls required.

8. Cook. One Redditor explained how watching her partner cook was a huge turn-on:

I f**king LOVE watching my boyfriend cook. I can stand there and watch him all day long. He's bustling around, chopping veggies and putting dry rub on meats and stirring things around in a pan, all confident and sure-like. He thinks he's just making dinner. What he doesn't know is that by the time the meal is ready, after watching him be so competent and unself-conscious and focused on making the food, I want to rip his clothes off and have my way with him first, and eat dinner later.

9. Use eye contact, "especially when there's a bunch of pretty girls around." Knowing that someone is giving you their full attention is a huge plus.

10. Be thoughtful. One user appreciates a guy "sending a text out of the blue to say you're thinking of me or sending a text in regards to something I said in passing." Forwarding an article you think might interest someone, remembering a difficult anniversary or wishing someone luck at a big meeting -- all small things that make a huge difference.

11. Hug from behind. According to one user, "It's cute, and it makes us feel safe." And who doesn't like hugs in general?

What are the most attractive things your partner does? Comment below, or tweet @HuffPostWomen.

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Before You Go

7 Steps To Mind-Blowing Sex
1. Don't Talk Yourself Out Of What You Need(01 of07)
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It's too easy for us women to convince ourselves to settle for less. We're so helpful and accommodating, so eager to please and afraid of rejection that we're quick to give up the things we need, including when it comes to sex.What we need to see is that doing this will leave us chronically frustrated. While it's true that every relationship requires a certain amount of compromise, going without the things that we really need just doesn't work. We'll end up unhappy in the relationship or resentful toward our partner.The bottom line is, we need to know what we can't live without, sexually, and what we just can't live with. We ignore these non-negotiables at the expense of a fulfilling sex life. (credit:Alamy)
2. Share Your Needs And Feelings With Your Partner(02 of07)
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If you can't ask them for what you want in bed, you shouldn't be sleeping with them. Good sex happens when we feel safe and at ease. If we're afraid to ask for something or to tell our partner that we don't like something, sex will never be more than mediocre.This second tip follows from the first one, in that once we identify what we want and don't want, we have to express these things clearly. It's unfair to expect our partner to be a mind-reader and "prove" that they care by somehow knowing what we want without our having to tell them. Healthy sex comes out of healthy communication.
3. Accept Your Body As It Is Now(03 of07)
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We need to be in touch with our bodies; with what feels good, what feels not so good and what feels wrong. We also really need to stop judging ourselves in terms of our weight and our shape. Only a superficial dope would give us a hard time over our imperfections. If someone makes us feel bad about our physical selves, this is more a reflection of his inadequacies than of our own.Our negative self-talk has to stop. The running commentary on how fat we are, how much cellulite or how many wrinkles we have is guaranteed to kill the mood, often before it even starts. Feeling good about our bodies is crucial if we're going to let go and enjoy ourselves. Being physically self-conscious will keep us from experiencing the joyful abandon of great sex.
4. Never Refuse Sex As A Punishment Or Use It As A Reward(04 of07)
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In the bad old days, some women were led to believe that the way to get a man to toe the line is to offer sex for good behavior or withhold it when the man has displeased them. Most of us today recognize this as hateful behaviour and a recipe for disaster.Men don't want to be controlled or punished, especially around sex. They don't want to be made to feel like little boys. When we're hurt or angry at our partner, we need to share our feelings with him in an adult way. We can even say that we're too upset for sex, right now. What we mustn't ever do is make him feel like we're deciding when he gets to have sex, based on whether he's been "good" or "bad."On the other hand, using sex as a reward turns us into sex objects and makes sex into a commodity for our partner to "earn." It's no longer two people being intimate or enjoying each other. Commodifying sex makes it into a business transaction and our bodies then become objects for trade.
5. No Pets In The Room(05 of07)
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We might love Fluffy or Rover, but they don't belong in the bedroom when we're being intimate. Our pets are very territorial and could get jealous or want to play, too. Dogs might bark or even growl. Cats might jump onto the bed and start walking around. We can avoid these disasters by remembering to shut the door and leave our four-legged friends outside.
6. Have A Sense Of Humor(06 of07)
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Sex is about connection and intimacy, but also it's about having fun. It can be mind-blowingly great or occasionally, things can go wrong. Having a good sense of humor about sex will keep things in perspective.Being able to laugh at ourselves and at the comical aspects of sex will take the pressure off the whole experience. We might love and adore our partner, but we don't have to be so serious about making love to them. Humour relieves pressure and is a great way to connect.
7. Enjoy The Give And Take(07 of07)
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The best sex is the kind in which each person is trying to please the other one. The sharing in sex is one of the things that make it great. It can be technically amazing, but when one person gets the impression that the other person really isn't there with them, it can ruin the whole experience.What makes someone a fantastic lover is not their technical ability or their repertoire of moves but their attentiveness and their efforts to make their partner happy. When both people show that they really care about meeting their partner's needs, sex becomes something wonderful. (credit:Alamy)
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