Why Motherhood Made Me A Better Person

Being a mother is by far the most challenging but most rewarding job I’ve ever had.
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I often do my thinking in the shower.  It’s when things just come to me sometimes like a bolt of lightening and sometimes like a soft whispering voice.  It’s when I pray the hardest and most intently for certain things.  It’s when I praise the most.  It’s when I come to understand and step out of the shower with a new outlook.  I feel like it’s when God lays things on my heart and it’s when I give Him things from mine.  Showers are the best part of the day, and today, I’ve realized that I’m a better person after those showers.  

Becoming a mother has been one of the biggest blessings in my life.  Being a mother is by far the most challenging but most rewarding job I’ve ever had.

 Motherhood has made me a better person.

I am more patient.

I’ve always been told how patient of of a person I am, especially with teaching kindergarten for 4 years.  I enjoy those little people, but there is a certain sense of contentment that comes with teaching your own kids.  I sat down with Laikyn today to work on our shapes, colors, letters and numbers, and I found myself being incredibly patient with her.  I remembered just drilling my 5-year-olds expecting them to be able to read by the end of the year, but then my eyes opened with my own baby.  I realized that every second I’m teaching her something whether it’s a letter or a shape or how to stir the gravy and lick the brownie bowl.  Patience really is a virtue, and since becoming a mother I’ve found mine growing more and more.  Something about having children of your own grows you into something you could have never been before.

I am more forgiving.

I distinctly remember having a hard time forgiving before having children.  I would hold on to the tiniest of circumstances...and it was holding me back! I’ve learned to live and love, let go and let God.  It’s all that you can do as a mother.  Forgive yourself. Forgive others. Move on.

I am more prayerful.

I recently told someone that going through pregnancy and having a baby truly made my walk with God stronger than ever.  I don’t know how you can go throughout the miracle of life and childbirth without knowing that God did all of that.  It’s incredibly miraculous.  Teaching my girls to pray has been one of my favorite things, ever.  Hearing Laikyn’s little prayers (even when it includes being thankful for lettuce..) melts my mama heart.

I am more compassionate.

I’m much more compassionate. My mind often wonders to how other children’s lives are and how we’re shaping our children to interact with them when they meet.  Life is one big web, and I pray everyday that I’m doing the best job I can as a mama to make my girls into sweet, caring, nurturing, compassionate and loving little people.

I am more mindful.

aka I am more worried. I think too often; worry too much.  What mom doesn’t though? And we haven’t even made it to the teenage years...

I am joyful.

The joy that comes with being a mother is like none other. It’s unexplainable and incomprehensible. Just when you think you can’t love anymore and your heart is going to burst....it grows more and shows you just to what lengths a moms love really can go.

I am more appreciative.

I appreciate my mom more than I ever have. I understand her love for me more now that I have children. I appreciate the sacrifices she made as I was raised and I appreciate becoming a mom through the sacrifices we’ve made. 

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BonBons Photography

I am thankful.

I am so incredibly thankful. Thankful for healthy kids.  Thankful for a home. Thankful for Jesus and everything He did so we can live.  Thankful is an understatement. 

I am blessed.

....I am tired, worried, fearful....but I’m all of these things because I’m a mom. I am all of these things because I love my babies.  I am all of these things, and a better person because of them.  I wouldn’t change a thing if I could; every circumstance, lesson learned, bumped head and bruised heart not only shapes our children into who they are, but shapes us into the mothers that they are looking up to.  We are who they have.  We are their people.  Be a good one; choose to be a better person.  

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BonBons Photography

Love Deeply. Give Freely. Laugh Often.

For more on motherhood, follow along with Ashlee on Instagram and at her blog Little Lovelies.

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Love In One Photo
Emmy and Zoe(01 of142)
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Jackson and Mickey(03 of142)
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The love between this dog and this boy is as pure as pure love comes! Jackson and Mickey Dog. Best friends forever!!!!! (credit:Tracy Rannazzisi)
Gavin and Riana(04 of142)
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It was taken two years ago by our friend. It was actually not planned and she just caught the shot as I was stealing a kiss. (credit:Riana Sherman)
Talya and Sam(05 of142)
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Love at first sight! This was taken 2 days after she was born. (credit:Jill Patir)
Melina and Avi (06 of142)
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This photo is from September 2010. I had just shaved my head for St. Baldricks in honor of my son Levi, pictured. He was diagnosed with stage 4 brain cancer (Medulloblastoma) in 2004 when he was only four. Surgery to remove the tumor left him mute, paralyzed and incontinent. He relearned all his life skills while undergoing multiple surgeries, chemotherapy and intense radiation. He is my hero. (credit:Melina Mayo)
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This photo is at our wedding day, our daughter ran up to be with us at the alter. (credit:Amanda Oberhaus)
Angie Ray(08 of142)
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My 6 year old Lucie with her then 5-days new little brother Eliot. Her expression was not posed, I had wanted her to look at the camera but he did a little sigh in his sleep and she said “aww” and turned her head towards him and closed her eyes. I teared up as I clicked the shutter, so magical. (credit:Angie Ray)
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Baby brother's first haircut (credit:Cali Bellini)
Julia and Chloe(10 of142)
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Evan and Lexi(12 of142)
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Logan, Marci and Lily(13 of142)
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This is my definition of love. Sister love. (credit:Lisa Hewson)
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Nathan and Danielle (16 of142)
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Emerson, Savannah and Tanya(17 of142)
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Here are my two "everythings"-kissing me!!! (credit:Tanya Radoff)
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My 9 yo and Kira. A rescue from the Austin Humane Society. (credit:Laura Hammons)
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This is my son and his new born baby sister (credit:Molly Buesgens)
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The attached photo is of my 3-year-old twins, Petra and Ivan. They're both on the autism spectrum, but Ivan's powers of speech are far more advanced than Petra's, and on some level he seems to know this. He makes sure she's not overlooked when we're doing family things, and occasionally takes her hand to walk with her when we're out. If she pulls away he reaches out to grab her hand again, to make sure she doesn't get left behind! (credit:Kris Harrison)
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Joanna and Luke(26 of142)
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This is a picture I took of my son and daughter while hiking. (credit:Bill Rosenbalm)
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Brothers and sister through adoption. (credit: Lisa Bushman)
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Carly helps little sister Brooklyn enjoy a lollipop. Brooklyn has a gross motor disability (Rett Syndrome) so she can't use her hands purposefully. (credit:Jeremy Springhart)
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JJ, Mr. Teddy, Jeter and Minnie(33 of142)
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JJ (boy)Mr. Teddy (the white butt)Jeter (the orange cat)Minnie (the kitten) We just had to put Jeter to sleep yesterday after 15 years of warmth and sweetness :'( (credit:Erin Moussa )
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This is me and my daughter, Chelsea. If I ever doubt that I am loved, this picture reminds me otherwise. (credit:Holli Powell)
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This is a picture of my then 16 year old son and his 12 year old sister about 6 weeks after she was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumor. It is the first day of school and I think it's easy to see the tragic love he feels.Hope Alizah Kimlee Fuller6/26/97 born 7/29/09 diagnosed with DIPG 3/10/10 died (credit:Deb Fuller)
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My sons... love how affectionate they are with each other. (credit:Toral Patel Jendi)
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Aiden gets wrestling tips from his big brother, Ryan (credit:Carol)
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This is a picture of my son, Elliot and I on his first birthday. Hehad just finished digging into his birthday cake and I was giving hima drink of water. We have a really special connection. I'm a singlemom and he is the best thing that ever happened to me. Love!! (credit:Elliot and Emily )
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Caught this picture of my husband and (at the time) 2mo old son catching a cat nap. Look at the smile of pure satisfaction (love) on my son's face. Neither would have wanted to be any other place in the entire world.
Ben and Lucy (43 of142)
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Big brother (Elias - 2.5 yo) meeting baby brother (Jackson - 1 day old) for the first time. (credit:Ashley Ruiz)
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Love is the first of many a newborn will take...first steps... (credit:Brenda Mendoza)
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The moment I met my twins. (credit:Doreen Murphy )
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This image was taken moments after mom, who had been looking on, had *that moment* - that moment when you realize your entire world has changed – that moment as a new mother that takes your breath away. Her eyes filled with tears of overwhelming joy and love and got both of us, the dna photographers, and the daddy to well up – the only one not crying was the 8 day old little angel in daddy’s arms. (credit:dna | photography)
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My four year old son with his Daddy doll while his Daddy was deployed. (credit:Erin Henderschedt)
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When we brought our son home from the hospital, I was not able to cradle him close to me. So every morning my husband tucked our little one in his robe and held him 'skin to skin' because I couldn't. (credit:Trisha Paradis)
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Our baby was born with hemolytic disease and was in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit for two weeks. This was when his brothers and sister woke up and discovered he was home with us. This was their first time seeing him with no wires, tubes or monitors. He is seventeen months old now and they still adore him as much as they did then. Bob and Jennifer Quinlan, along with David- age 12, Maisie- age 9, William- age 8 and Johnny- age one. (credit:Jennifer Quinlan)
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They are best friends! (credit:Maggie Fay)
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Sisters meeting each other for the first time. Tori age 2 and dani 18 hrs old (credit:Helen)
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My grandmother suffered from lung cancer months before my daughter was born, devastating news to our family . In this picture my daughter was just three weeks old as she was entertained by Grandma's charming Southern stories, old wives' tales, and superstitious expressions. Grandma loved her the minute she knew she was coming and every day she has been gone, I know that Grandma would love the little girl she has grown into. This picture is a constant reminder of the important 'things' in my life. (credit:Sara Gooley)
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This photo was taken in September 2012. Our daughter Kori Jo was headed in for surgery on her eyes.....I caught this moment between Kori and her Daddy. We were havin a grand old time after she had been given the 'juice', and she fell right in to this beautiful moment with her biggest fan. (credit:Amy Bement )
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Daddy, Garrett and Jacob(65 of142)
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This is a picture of my son meeting his Great grandmother for the first time ..I see love when I look at this picture. (credit:Karen Deroma )
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How much do I love that my photography student captured the love of my life in this series? My lives/loves all converge here: son, photography, teaching, learning. We traded photo shoots, so I'll send one of her with her dad that I took, in a separate email. (credit:Mao Mei Sonkin)
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My 5yo son, Carson, and his 7yo sister, Savanna. Carson has Leukemia (T-Cell ALL) - and was 3 months into treatment when I took this picture. This pictures says 1,000 words about the sibling bond they have for one another and the strength and laughter that goes along with it. I couldn't be any luckier than to have these amazing kiddos in my life. (credit:Kimberly Lenardson)
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I happily submit this photo of me, my husband and our sweet baby boy who was born on Jan. 6, 2013. Our family was created through the miracle of open adoption, and we will be forever grateful for our son's birthmother and birthfather! (credit:Kyle Rose)
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This is by far my absolute favorite photo of our fraternal twins when they were about four months old. I love the look on both of their faces. A special bond that only twins share. (credit:Tina Miller)
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Asha, age 3 hugs little brother -- 1 year old Jaisal. (credit:Mika Rao)
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Unfortunately taking a photo in the dark resulted in it being a little blurry, but I can't think of a picture that shows my 3 and 5 year olds' love for one another. They insist on sharing a little twin sized bed on the top bunk. (credit:Melissa Smith )
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Little Keona Sky of Denver, Colorado has been hospitalized for weeks with rare infant botulism and is slowly improving. This is a photo of her Keona with her big brother Micah as he finally gets to visit her in the hospital.Keona's mommy, Kari Henkel, is the sister of a dear friend of mine. (credit:Kristy Roloff)
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Love = My son and his dog sharing love and comfort when my son arrived home after a week of chemo. (credit:Jo Reed)
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It's blurry, but in this photo my 4 year old daughter Allie was introducing her 6 year old sister Ansley to her classmates as her show and tell "item." The way she is gazing up at Ansley is so full of sisterly love. (Teacher in background)I just wish I had my big camera to capture the moment, but I'm also so grateful phones have cameras or I would've missed it completely. (credit:Andi Prather)
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This photo is of my two youngest children, Kacie and Avrie in June 2011. Kacie was 6, and Avrie was about 6 weeks. Kacie just bent over and gently kissed Avrie's hand. This photo captured the love between two sisters perfectly, as their eyes meet, little Avrie smiles up at her big sister. And that admiration continues today.Kacie made the transition from being the little sister of Zachary, to middle child, and big sister to Avrie flawlessly. There is no one she loves more, than her little sister. (credit:Jennie Eckhaus-Katz)
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I took this picture of my sister during labor. She went through a lot for the love of my nephew, and my brother in law was by her side because of the love he had for his wife and unborn son.
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Davey and Bailey (89 of142)
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This is Davey, age 1, and Bailey, age 13. Taken in July 2012. She's so protective, and he's so in love with her. It's amazing to watch them together.. (credit:Kathy W. )
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This is my favorite photo of my boys (so far)BFFs :) (credit:Jenn Arvizu)
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My son is almost 4 years old, but this is the photo that will always represent "Love" for me. He was diagnosed with a condition called craniosynostosis when he was two months old. He underwent surgery to treat this condition- which involved surgically removing a portion of his skull when he was 4 months old. This photo was taken the day after his surgery. He is smiling at me (love) and my husband is holding his hand (love). This was the moment when I knew my baby was still my baby, and everything was going to be okay. I couldn't believe he was awake and alert enough to smile the very next day, and as banged up as he looked, he's never looked more beautiful in my eyes. (credit:Nancy Koons)
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Here, Mommy...eat a shell! (credit:Lisa Giannakopulos)
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This was taken at the Oregon Coast last fall. They are getting older and argue a bit more than usual but the love and reliance on one another is priceless. Thank you for letting me share my finest work (credit:Connie Hanson)
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This is my 9 week old son, Haaken meeting his 95 year old great-gramma for the first time. So much love in that squeeze. (credit:Jill Hadland)
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My son is a mommy's boy, but on this one day, he chose to snuggle with Daddy after work. (credit:Norma Reynolds)
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Let me introduce Alexis and Liam, siblings, ages 4 and 2 respectively. I'm a single mother and they are my rock. They were meant to be together, we make a wonderful family of three. (credit:Sarah Valois)
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My son Will and I reuniting after my first long weekend away from him. (credit:Sara Lanthier)
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This is the day my boys and my husband's girls became a family. (credit:Elizabeth Denham)
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This photo of my 3 year old daughter, Hailey, and her baby brother, Dylan defines love for me. The expression on her face is pure, happy love for her brother and it makes this mama so happy every time I look at it. (credit:Erin Coulter)
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Big bro and little sis. True sibling love! (credit:Jean Heffernan)
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My 2 year old twin boys that touches my heart Everytime I see it. Nathaniel lending a foot to his brother Nicolas while they enjoy some tv time (credit:Tanya Perez)
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One of my many, many definitions of love for my daughter Sophia: showing her how important it is to seek out those little languid pockets in time that are made precisely for being silly and laughing at ourselves.You are your own best friend, first and foremost. If you can't laugh at yourself, you're missing out - big time! (credit:Kerri Beauchesne)
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After 20 years of infertility and adopting 3 wonderful children who were now teenagers through some weird glitch in my body I became pregnant with Liam. Being almost forty and not very healthy it was a risky and complicated pregnancy. My oldest, my son Kevin was apprehensive and a bit angry at first becasue he was so worried about losing me and frankly a bit jealous about what this new birth child would mean to the family. Liam came early but healthy and the kids were allowed to see him while I waited in the ICU for them to see me. When Kevin walked in he was crying and told me Liam was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen and he was so glad I had him, a sentiment shared by sisters Alissa and Ashley aas well. This is a picture of the boys hands on the first day Liam was out of the incubator. (credit:Patricia Young Murray)
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My Twins (121 of142)
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James and Chris(125 of142)
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Taylor, Damien & Brandon (128 of142)
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Sophia and her Dad (130 of142)
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Brady and I (131 of142)
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Ethan, Madisin and I (132 of142)
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Ramsey and Daddy Having a Blast(133 of142)
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Lila Kate (135 of142)
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Ruby And Her Brother (138 of142)
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Julia and Katie(139 of142)
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Jack and I(140 of142)
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