50 Things to Remember About a 9-Year-Old Girl

One day soon, she will seriously doubt her ability to do anything. It is your job to remind her of the truth.
|
This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email.
Open Image Modal

By Shannon Ralph/The Next Family

1. She wants to be cuddled like the little girl she was not so very long ago.

2. Until she doesn't. Don't even think about touching her when she doesn't!

3. You are her very favorite person in the entire world... ever. Seriously.

4. Until five minutes later, when she can't stand the sound of your shrill voice and can't bear the sight of your smug face.

5. By dinner, you will be BFFs again.

6. She's witty. Almost too witty for her own good.

7. She is really funny. Hilarious, even.

8. You are not funny. Ever.

9. She can slam a door with the force and fury of an F5 tornado.

10. But she cannot close a cabinet or the refrigerator to save her life.

11. She will hate anything you buy for her to wear. It doesn't matter if she LOVES the same shirt in blue. She will hate it when you buy it in green. If you pick it out, it will suck. Plain and simple.

12. She will use all of your lotion. And your shampoo. And your body scrub. And your $43 bottle of retinol-rich-natural-wheat-protein-shiitake-mushroom-Anogeissus-tree-bark-infused anti-aging serum.

13. She secretly (or not so secretly) wants to wear make-up.

14. Don't let her.

15. If you tell her she cannot wear her fleece-lined winter boots to Target -- on July 12th, when the heat index is 102 -- you are an asshole. It really is for the best if you just go ahead and embrace your asshole-ness right now.

16. She could eat fruit snacks seven days a week, for every meal. To suggest otherwise is folly.

17. She thinks you can do anything. She's right.

18. She thinks she can do anything. Again, she's right.

19. One day soon, she will seriously doubt her ability to do anything. It is your job to remind her of the truth.

20. She needs her privacy. She will loudly demand it if you forget this fact.

21. This week, she'll want to play soccer. Next week, ballet. The week after that, karate. It's OK for her to "try on" a variety of activities as she figures out who she is.

22. Pink is for little girls. She wants a turquoise and lime green bedroom.

23. She is terrified of being different from other girls.

24. She has multiple personalities.

25. But it's perfectly normal, so don't fret too much.

26. She has discovered sarcasm.

27. But she's not nearly as tough as her excellent grasp of the sublime subtleties of sarcasm would suggest.

28. Be gentle. She can dish it out, but she can't take it.

29. She still needs her mommy.

30. But she will never admit it.

31. She looks to you for clues about how she will navigate this world as a woman.

32. Please act accordingly.

33. She craves your approval. She wants you to tell her she is doing a good job. She desperately needs your praise.

34. Expect vicious eye rolls when you do praise her, however. DO NOT be deterred.

35. She will beg to adopt every stray rabbit, squirrel, bird, kitten, puppy, frog and turtle that wanders into your yard.

36. But she would gladly sell her younger brother to the highest bidder.

37. She likes to spend your money. And she's quite good at it.

38. She isn't you.

39. She may look like you. She may act like you. She may sound like you. But she is her own person.

40. Don't try to make her you.

41. She reads cool books now -- like Harry Potter and Judy Blume and The Chronicles of Narnia.

42. And she watches movies and television that do not involve Dora the Explorer or Thomas the Tank Engine or that bald miscreant, Caillou.

43. Take advantage of this, and talk about literature and movies and television with her. She has a lot to say.

44. Meltdowns are still a thing.

45. Particularly when she doesn't get enough sleep.

46. She is a truly amazing mixture of awkward and elegant, gentle and fiery, self-possessed and petrified.

47. But she is starting to compare herself to others.

48. She will inevitably find herself lacking.

49. Let her know she is truly wonderful.

50. Every. Single. Day.

Also on HuffPost:

Famous Female Friendships
Marilyn Monroe and Ella Fitzgerald(01 of08)
Open Image Modal
While countless articles, films and documentaries have chronicled the lives of both America’s most famous sex symbol and the Queen of Jazz respectively, most leave out an important detail: their friendship with each other. Marilyn, who idolized and was inspired by Ella, supported her friend in the face of racism, by helping her get her first gig at a prominent nightclub in 1955 by promising to sit in the front row of the audience every night for a week. (credit:Image via KPLU Tumblr)
Gloria Steinem and Marlo Thomas(02 of08)
Open Image Modal
Marlo Thomas and Gloria Steinem met in 1967 when an agent pitched the idea of Marlo playing Gloria in a TV-movie. The movie never happened (and the agent turned out to be quite offensive), but the two activists have remained friends ever since. Says Marlo about Steinem, “We have been confidantes, soul mates and sisters.” (credit:Getty)
Beyoncé Knowles and Kelly Rowland(03 of08)
Open Image Modal
Beyoncé and Kelly's friendship dates back to their days as two of the three members of Destiny's Child. Though both went their own way over a decade ago, the two have remained close friends. Despite recent reports to the contrary, Kelly insists, "I love my sister. [Beyoncé] is so incredibly supportive. [She is] one of the closest people to me." (credit:Getty)
Penelope Cruz and Salma Hayek(04 of08)
Open Image Modal
Cruz and Hayek (who have been friends since early on in their careers) first worked together on the film “Bandidas.” In fact, they almost died together when the plane taking them to the set nearly crashed in 2006. Their friendship was strong even then -- Penelope said about the experience, “A thought came across my mind that if I were to die at that moment, at least I’d die with my best friend.” (credit:Getty)
Tina Fey and Amy Poehler(05 of08)
Open Image Modal
These hilarious women met in 1993 at an improv class in Chicago and continued to work together throughout the years at the "Upright Citizens Brigade" and "SNL" (where the two co-hosted the segment “Weekend Update” from 2004-2006). They eventually collaborated on films such as "Mean Girls" and "Baby Mama." Amy has said about Tina, "She’s...really, really funny and incredibly hard-working and a very supportive and loyal friend." Tina once quipped about Amy, "We're like Oprah and Gayle. Only we're not denying anything." (credit:AP)
Melissa McCarthy and Sandra Bullock(06 of08)
Open Image Modal
It seems that life imitates art for McCarthy and Bullock, who play a crime-fighting duo in this summer's much anticipated buddy comedy "The Heat." The film's director, Paul Feig, described the actresses as "inseparable…Normally after movies, those friendships go away. Theirs blossomed.” (credit:AP)
Oprah Winfrey and Gayle King(07 of08)
Open Image Modal
"Oprah and Gayle" are names that have practically become synonymous with "female friendship." Oprah has said of their friendship: "I wish every person on earth to experience somebody to care for them and to know them in such a way that they only want the best for you… When you become famous...a lot of people lose oxygen and they can’t make the summit with you. [It's good] to be able to have somebody who not only can make the summit, but stand at the summit with you and rejoices in your being able to make it.” (credit:Getty)
Hillary Clinton and Meryl Streep(08 of08)
Open Image Modal
It just makes sense that these two women, who are arguably better at their respective jobs than most other humans ever, discovered they are kindred spirits. The photo of the two taking a selfie at the 2012 Kennedy Center Honors Gala dinner became an instant classic, and Meryl gave a heartfelt introduction for Hillary Clinton at the 2012 Women In The World Summit stating, “She has turned out to be the voice of her generation. I’m an actress, and she is the real deal.” (credit:AP)

HuffPost Shopping’s Best Finds

MORE IN LIFE