American Politics To Continue Being A Grotesque Plutocratic Spectacle For The Foreseeable Future

American Politics To Continue Being A Grotesque Plutocratic Spectacle For The Foreseeable Future
|
Open Image Modal
Former Florida Gov. Jeb Bush speaks at the National Rifle Association convention Friday, April 10, 2015, in Nashville, Tenn. (AP Photo/Mark Humphrey)

It's been a while since we've checked in on how American politics is thriving within the Doom Loop of Oligarchy (TM Ezra Klein!), but a fresh dispatch from Politico's Mike Allen offers us another opportunity to goggle at the slow-motion death of American exceptionalism. The issue at hand, as ever, is the ruling class of billionaires who fund our presidential campaign dumb-show. More specifically, it's the Brothers Koch, who have an assignment for former Florida governor and presidential hopeful Jeb Bush. Per Allen:

In another surprise, a top Koch aide revealed to POLITICO that Jeb Bush will be given a chance to audition for the brothers’ support, despite initial skepticism about him at the top of the Kochs’ growing political behemoth.

Mr. Bush will be expected to perform a two-minute classical monologue about tax cuts, a two-minute comic monologue about tax cuts, and 32 bars of a contemporary Broadway musical ballad about union-busting.

This is good news for Jeb, I guess. As Allen notes, the last time the Kochs cooked up an audition, it was at their "winter seminar" in January, and according to those present, Florida Sen. Marco Rubio was the clear standout at that confab. But Bush will be getting "a second look" at the brothers' summer conference, because "so many Koch supporters think he looks like a winner."

Of course, as New York's Jonathan Chait points out, it was only yesterday that the Kochs "signaled" that their favorite in the race was Wisconsin governor (and historically over-eager Koch amanuensis) Scott Walker. Looks like we got some drama, y'all!

Obviously, winning the affection of the Koch brothers is a significant prize, since they've pledged to raise and spend the oddly specific amount of $889 million on the 2016 election cycle. But never fear -- there's a long list of other billionaire weirdos at whom candidates from across the political spectrum can cringe on bended knee, begging for boodle, if they fail to receive the Koch nod. Plus, there's an entire financial industry waiting to receive the private, reassuring genuflections of candidates who play populist on the weekdays.

It goes without saying that the fun part of this election is going to be watching all those political pundits argue about which candidate is the most "authentic."

Would you like to follow me on Twitter? Because why not?

Our 2024 Coverage Needs You

As Americans head to the polls in 2024, the very future of our country is at stake. At HuffPost, we believe that a free press is critical to creating well-informed voters. That's why our journalism is free for everyone, even though other newsrooms retreat behind expensive paywalls.

Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.

to keep our news free for all.

Support HuffPost

Before You Go

Some Of The Politicians Who Became Lobbyists
Trent Lott And John Breaux(01 of15)
Open Image Modal
Former Sens. Trent Lott (R-Miss.), left, and John Breaux (D-La.) started the lobbying group Breaux Lott Leadership Group in 2008. (credit:Bill Clark/Roll Call via Getty Images)
Tom Daschle(02 of15)
Open Image Modal
Former Sen. Tom Daschle (D-S.D.) formed The Daschle Group. (credit:Kiyoshi Ota/Bloomberg via Getty Images)
Chris Dodd(03 of15)
Open Image Modal
Sen. Chris Dodd (D-Conn.) became chairman and CEO of the Motion Picture Association of America. (credit:Paul Morigi via Getty Images)
Billy Tauzin(04 of15)
Open Image Modal
Former Rep. Billy Tauzin (R-La.) became president and CEO of the drug industry lobbying group Pharmaceutical Research and Manufacturers of America. (credit:Jay Mallin/Bloomberg via Getty Images)
Steve Largent(05 of15)
Open Image Modal
Former Rep. Steve Largent (R-Okla.) served as president of CTIA after leaving Congress. (credit:Phelan M. Ebenhack/Bloomberg via Getty Images)
Ben Nelson(06 of15)
Open Image Modal
Sen. Ben Nelson (D-Neb.) was named CEO of the National Association of Insurance Commissioners after he left Congress. (credit:Chris Maddaloni/CQ Roll Call via Getty Images)
John Ashcroft(07 of15)
Open Image Modal
Former U.S. Attorney General John Ashcroft started The Ashcroft Group. (credit:Mark Wilson via Getty Images)
Judd Gregg(08 of15)
Open Image Modal
Former Sen. Judd Gregg (R-N.H.) became CEO of the Securities Industry and Financial Markets Association. (credit:Tom Williams/CQ Roll Call via Getty Images)
Dick Armey(09 of15)
Open Image Modal
Former Rep. Dick Armey (R-Texas) has worked for DLA Piper and FreedomWorks. (credit:Amy Sussman via Getty Images)
Christopher 'Kit' Bond(10 of15)
Open Image Modal
Former Sen. Christopher "Kit" Bond (R-Mo.) joined Thompson Coburn when he left Congress. (credit:Chip Somodevilla via Getty Images)
Bob Packwood(11 of15)
Open Image Modal
Former Sen. Bob Packwood (R-Ore.) founded the lobbying firm Sunrise Research Corp. after he left the Senate. (credit:Jonathan J. Cooper/AP)
Jim Moran(12 of15)
Open Image Modal
Former Rep. Jim Moran (D-Va.) joined McDermott Will & Emery LLP as senior legislative adviser in its government strategies practice. (credit:Bill O'Leary/The Washington Post via Getty Images)
Saxby Chambliss(13 of15)
Open Image Modal
Former Sen. Saxby Chambliss (R-Ga.) became a partner at DLA Piper. (credit:Tom Williams/CQ Roll Call via Getty Images)
Jim Matheson(14 of15)
Open Image Modal
Former Rep. Jim Matheson (D-Utah) joined Squire Patton Boggs as a principal. (credit:Rick Bowmer/Associated Press)
Mark Begich(15 of15)
Open Image Modal
Former Sen. Mark Begich (D-Alaska) started his own firm, Northern Compass Group, and later joined Brownstein Hyatt Farber Schreck as a strategic adviser. (credit:Tom Williams/CQ Roll Call via Getty Images)