Pink Gets Real About Her Sometimes-Sexless Marriage

Raise your glass to Pink for getting real about the realities of monogamy.

The pop star explained the nuances of her 11-year marriage to racer Carey Hart in an interview with The Guardian published last week, noting there are times sex isn’t a factor. 

According to Pink, there are moments when she’s head-over-heels for Hart and others when she’s sure she never even wants to see him again. Per The Guardian:

“There are moments where I look at [Hart] and he is the most thoughtful, logical, constant … he’s like a rock. He’s a good man. He’s a good dad. He’s just the kind of dad I thought he’d be and then some. And then I’ll look at him and go: I’ve never liked you. There’s nothing I like about you. We have nothing in common. I don’t like any of the shit you like. I don’t ever wanna see you again. Then two weeks later I’m like, things are going so good, you guys. Then you’ll go through times when you haven’t had sex in a year. Is this bed death? Is this the end of it? Do I want him? Does he want me?” She takes a breath. “Monogamy is work! But you do the work and it’s good again.”

Some news outlets were quick to jump on the idea that Pink and Hart “haven’t had sex in a year.” While we don’t know whether Pink was hyperbolizing the couple’s dips, such periods aren’t uncommon: Relationship satisfaction declines nearly twice as quickly for couples with kids compared to those without, Fortune reports. Many report having sex less often both in the months after a birth and for the duration of parenthood. And overall, sexless marriages are more common than you may think.

As Pink points out, diligent relationship work is key in making sure both partners’ needs are met. Last week, Kristen Bell opened up about her longtime marriage to Dax Shepard and once again credited couples therapy as critical to keeping their monogamous relationship aflame.

There are other ways to turn a sexually lagging relationship around, like being open and honest with your partner in everyday situations.

And sometimes, just knowing that not everyone’s marriage is “f**kin’ perfect” helps too.